The Chains and The Heart
by Scribe of Turesa
Summary: Raph's been an slave for eight years, trapped in an underground world...he didn't know one of his brothers was there too...will he have the strength to save his brother? Does the brother want Raph's help?
1. Chapter 1: Hunger

**Disclaimer: I only own the plot and Aria as well as any other OCs.**

****LOOK AT THE Notes!!!!**

**1.) Raph and the other brother are 23 in this fic, they are mutant turtles.**

**2.) This concept is based off of the Episode "The Big House" from Turtles in Space. As in the multiple sentient races.**

**3.) This whole fic will be written in Raph's POV.**

**4.) Its going to be a heart wrencher…*****

**Here.**

**We.**

**Go…**

**"sniff"**

**Chapter 1: Hunger**

My eyes flutter open as the bell rings, signaling me that a new day is here. Aria whimpers against me and snuggles closer. She's hungry, as hungry as I am.

Hunger…its something I thought I knew. But I was wrong. Hunger is more painful than that. I've learned what its like to go without food. I learned that I could go nearly two weeks without it if I had to, if Aria didn't have enough to eat.

Aria…my little girl, my daughter. Her carapace is dark like mine, but her skin is lighter…more like her mother's, something between my own emerald and Tahsehle's forest. Aria had light brown hair when she was born and it darkened up as she got older. Tahsehle abandoned Aria…left her to die. When she ceased to be pregnant, she stopped getting extra rations and left Aria alone. Aria would've died if I hadn't found her when I did. I…I killed Tahsehle…threw her in the dark area of the underground river. When the foremen found out I…I was beaten. That's how I lost my voice.

I coughed blood for days. My throat was crushed, it was a miracle I even lived. I had only spoken Aria's name to her twice before that. All she knows is her number: 458T90ST82, and mine: 369T82. She's identified as my daughter my the last four digits of her number, ST82, Sire: Terapin 82, me. I'm nothing more than a number now.

She whimpers and looks at me. I manage a smile and hold her close. Then slowly get to my feet I hear the Foreman coming, he's yelling for us "slime" to get moving. I glance around me at the stone walls and sigh. Aria gets up and follows me out, hands reaching up making grabbing motions. I struggle not to smile and kneel to allow her to climb up onto my carapace.

Aria…how I wish I could show you the sky…you would love it my daughter. She's nearly five now. Hard to believe. I've been here eight years, eight long years…the only piece of joy I've had is Aria.

My stomach growls as we head for the cliffs to work. Aria flutters her hands against my shoulder, asking when food comes. I fight tears, I never got the chance to teach her to speak and no other slave would dare to speak in the presence of a Foreman. Not like me…I used to bait them, laugh at them when they couldn't break me. When they got angry because I wouldn't cry out at the sting of a hot-whip. Hot-whips…I shutter, they burn my carapace and any other Terapin's that they touch, the equal for us of a true whip to the others around here. I notice a Triceraton and dip my head. He nods back.

Everyone seems almost festive today and then I remember why and wonder how in the world I could forget.

Its ration day. We get food.

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And the painful adventure begins. "sniffs"

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	2. Chapter 2: Pain

**Disclaimer: just Aria and the Plot.**

**Chapter 2: Pain**

Never realized how much I loved my brothers until we were separated. Wonder what they'd think of me now, bending my back and hauling heavy stones across this underground quarry. I smell the food cooking and my stomach growls. Aria is picking up small stones and lose rock to prevent us men from tripping. I've fallen before and had a stone trap my ankle, if the man that I was teamed with hadn't managed to hold the block up as much as he did I would've been crippled. A foreman brandishes a hot-whip at Aria as she ducks in front of him to grab a stone. I growl and stop, muscles tense. The Foreman glares at me but gives Aria a dirty look and returns to his watch. I'm known for attacking anyone for hurting her, I've nearly killed a Foreman before. They tend to avoid angering me too much because of that.

Aria charges over to me showing me the bright stones encased in the marble piece she has. I manage a smile and then dig into the ground grunting as I struggle to haul the heavy block. The man beside me drops his head and squares his shoulders straining to help me haul the weight up the slant. He's a…what do you call his kind? Oh a Ahalgan. He's kinda like a human, but his skin is more brightly colored and he had spikes instead of hair.

"So, you're the one they call the Demon," the man gasps. I grunt and nod. Heh, the Demon. Almost forgot they called me that. Forgot my real name ages ago, I became 369T82, lost who I was. I don't even remember my brothers' names after all this time, let alone what they look like. I miss them so much…and father…I miss him…I fight tears and bend forward, casting a quick glance to make sure Aria is not behind us. She's been nearly crushed when I've slipped before. Never forgave myself for that.

Then suddenly there's a sharp pain across my right shoulder. I grunt in pain and try to keep pulling. The pain gets worse and I grunt, we're almost there and then I can go get food for Aria…Oh please…just a few more feet. The pain doubles as I struggle to haul the stone upward. The man next to me strains forward, then I feel my arm jerk from my right socket and I can't stop the strangled scream. I drop to my knees and struggle to rise, the pain in my arm tripling. Please…I'm so close.

Aria is next to me, gripping my face. I'm struggling to breathe, suddenly I realize the harness is being removed and my shoulder is being examined.

"Easy Demon," the Medic says. I look at him, gritting my teeth from the pain.

"Well?" the Foreman asks.

"Dislocated the shoulder," The Medic replies, "A week off and let it heal, he will be good as knew. Good protein during the time"

"A week? I don't have a week to wait around for a slave to heal!" the Foreman snarls, "he'll get the same rations as the others!"

I grip Aria and struggle to move my right arm. I can't lose her, please…no…please…I'll work with it damaged, don't send her to breeding stock. Please.

"Its an order," the Medic replies sharply, "A week off, let that arm heal and double rations, high protein!" The man next to me looks at me in pity. He knows as much as I do what could happen to Aria.

I struggle to my feet and move slowly back to the harness. The medic watches me in horror as I struggle to put the thing back on. The Foreman looks smug.

"See? He's fine," he growls. The Medic glares.

"I'll go to the Master about this," the medic growls. The Foreman freezes. I feel like someone just kicked me. Our Master Hagrin demands that we be in at lest 50% health at all times. The Foremen tend to cut our rations short to feed their already stuffed bellies and work us longer than we're supposed to be. I watch nervously, my shoulder on fire. Aria whimpers and hugs my leg.

"FINE!" The Foreman growls, "set his shoulder and take him to the ration tent."

I feel suddenly weak and drop my gaze. Aria's amber eyes lock with mine. I manage a smile.

"Foreman Jakh, that chibi better be here when I come to check on him everyday," the Medic orders. I nearly hug he puts my shoulder back and I nearly slam him into the stone block it hurts so bad.

"Demon, name's Gahre, number's 7908A76," the Ahalgan tells me, I've made a friend. The Medic touches my good arm gently and I jump before following him, Aria close beside me. I keep my arm close to my plastron and trudge after the Medic. Touching Aria's carapace with my good hand as we follow him. He smiles at her and she hides behind me.

I've made two friends.

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	3. Chapter 3: The River and Some Reflection

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs"…do I really have to tell you?**

**Chapter 3: The River and Some Reflection**

When I hurt my shoulder yesterday, Aria and I left with the medic to receive ration marbles. Around here small marbles represent money. We trade the marbles for food, cloth, sewing materials, bedding, and boots. We get a certain amount of marbles every three weeks, white for food, black for anything else. I've been saving up black marbles for a large swatch of leather for new boots for me and Aria. Mine are nearly falling apart, despite my attempts to patch them together with the scraps of cloth I have around the cave. Aria's are getting too small, I'll reuse the leather for patching after I make her new ones.

Aria skips ahead of me, giggling as she spots the river were heading toward. This river runs underground and it's the only source of fresh water down here, in spots the current is fast, others, its slow enough to bathe or swim in. The edges are lighted and the slaves, heaven forbid the foremen touch the water, marked the safe areas.

The pouch full of marbles clink as I drop down and then reach up to help Aria down to the sandy area below the rough rock. Those marbles are our life line, if I lose them, we'll starve.

As I look over the area I notice the women have brought their kids down here. They are Breeding stock women but I notice a few Weaving women too.

There are three categories for each gender. Women are divided into Breeding Stock, Weavers, and Sellers. Men are divided into Breeding Stock, Haulers, and Sellers.

Breeding stock women are, hate to think it, baby factories. The only thing they are allowed to do is have kids. Breeding Stock men spend the time from fifteen to forty-five making kids. That's all they do. Weaver women make clothes, blankets, or boots. They are allowed to pair off with Hauler men, they and the man just have to pay a hefty price of black marbles for the right to it. Haulers, like me, drag huge blocks of a marble-like stone to a shaft that goes up toward the surface. People by this stone and use it for their homes and buildings. Every Hauler has a certain amount of stones assigned to them each day, most of us can't meet the quota, we just get too tired. Sellers of both genders are simply those that get sold, considered unfit to work down here. Can't say if they're the lucky ones or not. They get to see the sky but, who knows what kind of owners they end up with.

Aria is tugging at my belt and pointing. I follow her finger and spot the kids. I shift nervously but nod. I don't like having her away from me much, but she should be able to play with kids her age.

I spot a few Foremen around the edge watching the kids run about. I give them all a cold glare and find a spot where I can see Aria easily. Before I'm fully seated an old Teripan woman waves me over. I recognize her as the woman who taught me how to sew when Aria was a baby. I walk over and sit beside her, dipping my head in greeting.

"Hello Demon," she greets. I nod again and tip my good hand toward her, showing that I'm concerned about her. I keep an eye on Aria out of the corner of my eye. If she gets in the way of a Foreman, they'll take her to Breeding Stock. She doesn't know how to sew yet, I'm going to teach her and then find a woman willing to teach her the rest of the weaver trade.

I'm watching Aria when the old woman taps my hand and presses a bundle of cloth into my lap. It's rust-red. I raise an eyed ridge and then unfold it. I fight shocked tears of joy, it's a dress. A real dress, not the rough attempts I've been making for Aria.

The old woman pats my hand gently.

"I know you're trying dear. The pattern is pinned to it," she comforts.

I look over at Aria, she's playing with those kids, all smiles. I look back to the old woman. I touch my good hand, fingers first, to my heart and then extend them out to her. My way of saying thanks.

"You're welcome," she replies, she leans forward and cups my chin, "You've got a good heart lad."

Suddenly I hear Aria yelp and twist toward her. One of the older kids is playing rough. I growl, the kid looks at me and then lets go of her. Then as I start to turn back around, Aria does something that makes me smile, she pushes the older kid down and takes a fighting stance I taught her. The older kid shakes her head and Aria relaxes.

"She's got spirit that one," the old woman chuckles. I grin and tap my chest. She smiles.

"Yes, like you Demon," she replies and then she gives me a thoughtful look over, "do you know how to write? English letters?"

I'm stunned. She actually wants to try and have a conversation with me, other than my feeble attempts at sign language. Then, my heart drops, I don't remember how to write.

How…how will I ever tell my brothers who I am? If I ever see them again…they…they'd never know me anyway.

Tears of frustration and grief make their way to my eyes and I fight them back.

"Demon?" she asks.

I touch my head, then hold up one finger, and shrug. I find myself fumbling with Aria's new dress, upset and angry I guess. I want so desperately to _say_ something.

"Hmmm." she murmurs, "Here."

She traces out some lines and I stare at them in confusion. I feel my eye ridges tense and pull together as I struggle to work out the meaning of the lines. Then, slowly I recognize things…the lines…form…letters. LETTERS! Letters form words right? I smiled slowly as I work out the different letters.

D-E-M-O-N

Then slowly I scratch out rough figures of the same letters and end up with:

D-E-M-O-N = 369T82

She nods and my heart soars. _That _is my name!

"Very good. See? You haven't forgotten as much as you thought," she praises.

I glance toward Aria and notice she's left the rest of the kids and is currently playing with a little boy. He's destined for breeding stock from the mark on his hand. I ache for the child, his life will be nothing more than loveless pairings and hopeless breedings. I was subjugated to that once.

Tehsehle wasn't the love of my life. She was paired to me and I was drugged into it. Forced to give my seed into her womb. I was drugged because I refused to bed with a woman I didn't love. After I killed her, I was moved to Hauling work, they figured it would give me something better to do than pass my rebel genes on.

"Demon?" the old woman asks, touching my hand. I jump a little torn from my thoughts and turn back to her allowing my eyes to ask my questions.

"Did you name your little girl?" she asks softly.

I nod and smile turning back to Aria. She looks up and smiles back. The little boy looks our way and I gasp. His eyes…they're…familiar. I knw someone with eyes like those…

The old woman is drawing in the dirt again…more letters and she touches my arm and points to the letters.

"Tell me her name," she whispers.

I pull myself away from those familiar eyes and look down at those letters, struggling to remember the sounds they made.

Aria… Arrr-eh-ah…does it start with that… "r" letter or…no… "ar". Right? Yeah…I think that's right…

I sketch the letters out and then nod as I look at them. They seem right anyway.

A-R

"eh"…what makes that sound? I try a few different combinations before I end up with "e". but it doesn't look right…what else might make that sound? Uuuuuuhhhhhgggg…I'm getting frustrated now.

As I sit here struggling to work out the letter Aria brings that little boy over. I glance at him and struggle to pull my gaze away from those sad, scared eyes.

"Hello, little one," the old woman greets. The boy moves closer to Aria. He's a sweet little kid, real quiet. Aria hugs him and gives him a gentle smile. I give him a smile as well. As much as his eyes amaze and confuse me, I don't wan to scare him.

I turn back to those frustrating letters and force myself to focus. The old woman leans over and gives what I have a long look over.

"hmmm," she murmurs and then she circles "i" and says, "'î' , "ë", and "eh"."

I grin and add "i" in.

A-R-I

Then I know how it ends.

A-R-I-A

I point to Aria's name and then to Aria, grinning broadly.

"Ar-eh-ah," the old woman says. Then she turns to Aria and points to her, then the letters and then says it. It takes three tries and pointing to me and my name before Aria figures it out. She's still confused though I can see it in her eyes.

The old woman draws out a few more letters and says "Yelgeh"

Y-E-L-G-E-H

Yelgeh I know her name now. It takes another two times and then it clicks. Aria's eys get huge and she looks at me

"Demon?" she asks. I nod and touch her chin smiling the whole time. The Yelgeh teaches her a word I 've ached to hear Aria say. Yelgeh teaches Aria to call me "dad".

I'd forgotten about the boy until he starts whimpering and see him staring at us. Those eyes…why do they call to me so much?

Yelgeh cups his chin and smiles before pulling him gently into her lap and looking at his arm.

"Hmmm," 8052ST987...603T987 is going to be moced to hauling soon. He's been transferred because, like you Demon, he refuses to breed," Yelgeh whispers.

She cradles the boy and smiles at him, before looking around. She looks back at the boy.

"Where's your mother?" she asks gently.

Tears fill the boy's eyes and he starts shaking.

"Sh-she…wouldn't wake up," he whimpers.

My heart shatters. I can't technically take him in…no matter how much I wish I could.I'm not his father. But I'm _drawn_ to him. I look at Aria and weight the problems in my mind and come to a conclusion. I hand Aria her new dress and open my good arm to the boy.

His eyes widen and then before I can blink he leaps at me. I cradle him close and let him cry. Aria smiles and I know she hoped that this would happen.

But how will I feed us all? What will I do with both of them while I'm working?

"Bring them here in the morning," Yelgeh says, "I'll keep an eye on them both. It's about time Aria learned the Weaving skills anyway."

I nod, still cradling the boy, and smile at Aria. Then I realize something.

What will I call the boy?

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	4. Chapter 4: 6039T987

**Disclaimer: just the OCs and Plot**

**Chapter 4: 6039T987**

After my shoulder heals I find Yelgeh waiting by the split between the river path and the path to the hauling yards. Aria takes the little boy I've started calling "gaeh", which means "little one" in Yelgeh's language.

I honestly think that the father should name him. But who knows if I'll ever meet him or if the father would claim him and name Gaeh. For now he is my son, Gaeh.

Aria hugs Gaeh as he whimpers and reaches for me. I cup his chin and gently press his face to my plastron. I hug Aria too and then stand up and nod to Yelgeh. She smiles and takes the chibis off as I turn and head toward the hauling yards. Yelgeh will keep them safe and occupied so I can get my quota done for the day and hopefully catch up on what I've fallen behind on.

I've hauled three blocks from the quarry yard before I see him, 6039T987. He's thin and he doesn't have boots yet so his feet are already tore up. His carapace is black, like mine, unusual for a Teripan. Most Teripan have dark-brown, golden-tan, or cream-tan carapaces. His skin is a leaf green, lighter than my own Emerald, even lighter than Aria's Forest, slightly darker than Gaeh's New-Leaf Green though.

So this is Gaeh's father, a figure who bends and obeys every command. Whose body and carapace are marked by scars and hot-whip marks, Down cast eyes and completely submissive, I can't even tell what color his eyes are. But, still, he draws me to him…like Gaeh did.

I hear a sharp word and jerk my attention back to the work at hand, digging into the gorund and throwing my weight forward against the harness, straining to haul the block with the four others next to me.

When I'm returning down the ramp I see him, 6039T987, on the ground. I see th ahot-whip fall across his carapace, hear his cries and freeze.

I _know_ that voice.

He struggles to get up and callapses, the hot-whip falls again, it hits his legs. He screams and drags his legs close.

Then it hits me….that's my _brother!_

I'm running before I realize it. I find myself standing over him and clench my fists. The Hot-Whip comes and I catch it in my hand, it burns my hand, but I jerk the whip away.

One hits my carapace and I cry out in pain, a voiceless cry. Yet I refuse to let them whip my brother again. He's too weak too handle that. Then suddenly the whipping stops and the foremen back away. I'm breathing hard and shaking. My brother is barely breathing below me. I can hear his whimpering gasps.

"Enough," an elderly man orders. I turn to the man and feel my blood freeze, it's our Master, our owner.

"Get back to work." he orders the others, then he turns to me, "Move."

I clench my fists and shake my head.

"Do you want him to die?" our owner asks.

I pause, shake my head and step back. Our owner kneels and checks my brother's pulse then waves a medic over. They move him to a stretcher and start to leave. Desperate not to lose him I wine and follow. Our owner stops and points toward the Hauling yard, shaking his head.

"Get back to work," he orders and then turns to follow t medics.

I'm forced to obey, I need food for Gaeh, Aria, and myself. I only hope I get to see my brother again, alive.

I hope by then Ill have remembered his name.

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	5. Chapter 5: Reunited

**Disclaimer: and why do I have to say this again? We all know I don't own anything but the Plot and OCs.**

**Chapter 5: Reunited**

Weeks pass before my brother is seen in the yards again. Hunger has again become my constant companion. Gaeh and Aria eat better than me, I make sure of that.

I spot my brother as I leave the hauling yard and pause to wait for him. He stumbles by without looking at me. I jog after him and touch his arm. He jerks away and backs up, still not making eye contact. Again I try to get his attention, this time he sprints away and I lose him among the crowd of Haulers.

Its another week before I see him again. I have Aria and Gaeh down at the river getting a bath done I managed to save up enough black marbles for some soap. Our clean clothing is in the sack on my carapace. Gaeh is skipping ahead with Aria. He's gotten bolder since I first took him in, less timid and clingy. Aria has too, I think she likes having someone to take care of.

"DADDY!" Gaeh calls. I look his way and chuckle. Aria has already stripped her dress off and folded it before putting it on the stone ledge on the edge of the river. Gaeh is standing and eyeing the moving water nervously, like he's afraid it'll bite him. I walk over and after sitting down I strip off my ragged boots and my pants, like most Teripan men I don't wear a shirt and neither does Gaeh. We do have jackets, but we don't need those all the time, only when the cold months come and it gets cold even down here. I put our things by the sack and drop into the river, hissing a little from the cold. I dunk under to get used to the temperature and then turn to Aria.

"LOOK DADDY!! I'M OUT DEEP!" she calls. The current has fast pockets out that far, that not even a full grown Teripan man can fight. I grunt and wave her in. She starts to pout, but when I point beside me and glare she comes in. I nod when she's close enough and turn back to Gaeh who is standing at the edge looking scared. I smile at him and prepare myself to catch him. I hold out my arms and make a gesture for him to jump out. He pauses, eyeing the water and then jumps. I catch him and he tenses up as if scared of the water.

I chuckle and ease him down into the water, giving him time to get used to it. His hands tighten around my arms but after a while he calms down and starts to try and swim a little. I put him where its most shallow and remind Aria to stay close while I grab the soap, shivering as the air hits my wet skin. I grab the soap and drop back in, shivering as the water takes the cold air's place.

Gaeh is having fun now though picking up pebbles and holding them to the light to find out their color. I smile as I catch Aria swimming against a slow current to build up her strength. I wave Gaeh to me with a soft whistle I thought up for him. Aria's is higher, more piercing, Gaeh's has two notes.

He moves over to me and I have him sit down on the ledge while I work the soap and some sand into a lather. When I've got it ready I start to scrub Gaeh's carapace clean, revealing the black, umber, and grayish tones in the whorls. He giggles and tries to pull away. His carapace is still sensitive since he's so young, so it tickles him. I tickle him playfully along his sides where the plastron and carapace merge, the skin is sensitive there. He giggles and squirms a little, pushing my hands away. After his carapace shines clean I wash the sand/soap lather off my hands and pull one of the precious soap squares to me and begin washing his face and the rest of him off. He giggles as I scrub him off. I smile and then make a new sand/soap lather to wash his plastron. When I've got him cleaned up I let him to play in the water, making a quick gesture to stay out of the sand. He hesitantly drops back into the shallow spot and starts hunting for bright stones again.

Aria's turn. The little minx won't come over. I start to playfully chase her, she giggles and lets out a shriek as I catch her. I start tickling her sides and she squirms, laughing.

"DADDY!" she gasps.

I chuckle and sit her down on the same ledge where I had Gaeh sit. She turns around to let me scrub her carapace. The black and umber whorls become visible as the dirt and grime is removed. She's holding her hair out of the way, I managed to just squeeze out enough black marbles for hair soap and a comb for her hair. An early Midwinter gift I guess.

I grab the hair soap and lather it up after I finish with her carapace and scrub her head, the umber-reddish-brown locks slowly become visible. I honestly thought her hair was dark brown. I smile as her hair gets clean and carefully pull out the simple stone comb before I brush it out. Aria's eyes get big and she smiles, stopping me so she can see the comb. She hugs me.

"Thanks Daddy," she whispers, I smile through my tears. How I wish I could give you more my daughter. Clean, warm clothes, the sight of the sky, the sunset…so much I want you to know…and know you never will.

I give her the soap to finish getting clean as I start to wash the front of myself off, I'll need Aria and Gaeh's help to get my carapace clean. Back home, my brothers would've helped me, coming into the shower long enough to scrub the grime that might have built up, off. Its as I'm coming up from under the water that I see him, my brother.

He's down stream…covered in blood.

I motion for Aria to stay close to Gaeh. She nodds and I head toward my brother, fighting the quickening current from taking me off my feet. My brother is trying to clean himself off, but he keeps losing his balance.

I catch him as he starts to fall again. He yelps and tries to pull away. He throws off my own balance and I nearly fall.

When I right myself he's sobbing and shaking. Then…I hear what's he's saying.

"Please…don't…please…" he begs.

I feel my eyes ridges pull together as I frown in confusion. I grab his chin gently and make him look at me. I freeze, his eyes are just like Gaeh's…golden-brown.

But they're dull, almost hopeless looking, full of fear and pain.

My heart breaks…my poor brother.

Then I remember his name and I feel like everything stopped and broke apart.

This quaking mass of fear…is my older brother…Leonardo.

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	6. Chapter 6: Convincing Leo

**Disclaimer:**** Uh….just OCs and Plot**

**Warning:**** Leo's been through a **_**lot**_** under the hands of the foremen. So he's pretty much a mess for a while. Nobody kill me when you figure out what happened to him.**

**Leo: The only reason I agreed to this is to spread the word on how much it can effect the victims. "glares at me"**

**Me: "pats his carapace" Relax Leo…**

"**Leo grunts and grumbles"**

**Chapter 6: Convincing Leo**

I look at him in shock. Then I see something that make my broken heart drop into my stomach. There are cuts and split bruises around my brother's eyes…and they're infected. Tipping his head I get a better look at his eyes, they're all foggy and bloodshot, oozing pus around the edges. It looks painful and I doubt he can even see me.

"Are you going to…to…" he sobs, his whole body is just quaking.

What? What does he think I'm going to do to him?

I think of something then that might help him recognize me. I inhale is sent and confirm my thoughts on the fact that it hasn't changed much, mine shouldn't have either then. Then my stomach twists and I taste bile. My brother's sent is tainted by another's…another _male's_ sent.

Rage explodes within me, stronger and more hell bent than I've ever known. I'll _kill_ him….I swear it. I pull Leo's quaking frame to me and press his face against my shoulder, willing him to catch my sent. Hoping he recognizes me. I cradle him and let my angry tears fall, I weep bitterly without my voice I can't comfort him. Just hugging him, like I am now, is terrifying him. Then suddenly he stops trying to pull away and clings to me.

"Raphie?" he sobs, "oh please…Raphie…is it you?"

Raphie? Who's…Raphael…Raph…Raphie…me…that's my name. _My_ name.

I close my eyes and hug him tight, nodding and sobbing.

"Please don't leave me alone," Leo begs, it feels like he's trying glue himself to me.

Never brother, I'm here…I'll protect you. Just like you protected me when we were younger. No one will hurt you again I _swear _it.

It takes me awhile to convince him to come with me, and even then to let me follow him and guide him back to the kids. He panics the first time I touch his carapace, tries to run, but he calms when he hears me grunt and make a soft crooning sound in the back of my throat. Its enough to let him know I'm trying to comfort him. When I get him by my things he panics again as I start to crouch behind him to clean his carapace and legs. It takes me ten minutes to calm him down enough to get him cleaned off.

As I finish he grips my hand desperately.

"Please…don't leave," he begs. I hug him and guide him to the rock ledge where he sits as I finish my own bath. Aria helps me get my carapace fairly clean and I get what I can reach scrubbed off; but even so it doesn't get truly clean.

I glance up, Leo is sitting off to the side in an upright fetal position; arms wrapped tightly around his knees.

As I rinse off I eye his ragged pants beside him, I wouldn't let him put them back on. Despite the fact that it obviously unnerves him, they're filthy and he has enough infections as it is, he doesn't need one _there._

I made him put on my clean ones, they might be too big but at least they're _clean_. The bleeding stopped down there, thankfully, even so, I'm going to take him to Tiren, the Medic who helped me with my shoulder.

Convincing Leo to let Tiren look him over is a whole other story. He barely let _me_ clean him off.

As I get out of the water I grab our dirty clothes and then lean over to scrub them as clean as possible in the water below. I sit and work the cloth for a while, glancing up to check on the kids and then Leo, who hasn't moved yet. When I finish I lay them under one of the torches to dry and return to Leo and the kids. I pull out my new boots, that I'm working on, and finish stitches the main pieces. I've already finished Aria and Gaeh's boots.

I glance at Leo and see his battered feet, then look back at the boots I'm working on. As much as I could use a new pair, Leo has _none._

I glance back at Leo. He's rigid, every inch of his body prepared to move, and I can smell his fear.

My poor brother…what did they do to you?

I know by the sent I found on him earlier , that he was raped, but as much of a problem that would've caused emotionally, he acts like he's endured torture…physically and emotionally.

I turn back to the boots and finish the last stitches, fingering the tough, new, leather a moment. Then I reach into my bag and grab the extra pair of clean woven socks I brought, before getting up and putting my sewing things away. I drop into a crouch next to Leo and after checking on the kids I turn my attention back on my brother. He jumps when I touch his arm, making as if to scramble away. But after I start crooning softly and gently pull him close I feel him relax and then cling to me.

"Raphie?" he whimpers.

I hug him tighter, nodding and then touch his foot. He jumps, but then I make him touch the boots and socks. Tears, just, start rolling down his cheeks and he sobs.

"Why…are you…" he manages, "you still want to help me…"

I cradle him close and fight the anger and pain inside, anger toward those who broke my brother's spirit and pain for my hurting brother. How much I desperately ache to tell him he's safe, that I'm there for him. I gently wipe his tears away before helping him put the socks and boots on. His feet are pretty tore up, and I'm worried about infection, like his eyes. After I get the boots on him I wrap an arm around him and pull him close, He buries his head in my shoulder and just cries softly. It isn't until he grows quiet and starts to fall asleep that I realize how tired _I _am. I sigh and whistle for Aria and Gaeh, gently untangling Leo and getting up to gather up our things.

Leo whimpers a little and makes a grabbing motion in the direction where I was. I reach out and squeeze his hand before gathering everything up and helping my _nephew_ get dressed in his clean things. Aria pulls the dress Yelgeh made her over her head and draws her comb through her hair to straighten it.

I smile, pleased that my gift causes her so much joy.

Gaeh holds out a few bright pebbles and insists that I _must_ look at them. I chuckle and give them a nod of approval.

Leo whimpers again and I turn to him and help him up, pulling him against me after I put the sack back over my carapace. Aria and Gaeh give Leo confused looks but they don't question my bringing him into our home.

The first night I never get Leo to sleep next to the rest of us, too many painful memories and still too worked up over the rape I guess. I sit beside him as he falls asleep and then I cover him up with one of the thin blankets I've collected over the years. I settle down for the night a few feet away; Aria curling up beside me, glued to my plastron, her head against it and Gaeh snuggled close against my opposite side. For the first time in a long time…I'm happy and I sleep better than I have in years. I make Leo a silent promise before I close my eyes though;

_No matter what family is still family, and I swear I will help you find your strength again and conquer your fears. I will never let another hurt you again._

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	7. Chapter 7: Power of Kindness

**Disclaimer:**** Nope….only OCs and Plot**

**Chapter 7: Power of Kindness**

I took Leo to Tiren yesterday and just like I predicted, Leo freaked. The second Tiren started looking his injuries over, Leo bolted. It took me hours to find him and even longer to convince him to let Tiren look him over again. Now he's got these patches on his eyes and a bandage wrapped around his head to keep them in place. His feet are all wrapped up and he got the stitches he needed down there. I have to change the bandages and put these drops in his eyes everyday and his sight should come back. He's asleep now, curled next to me, tense as a spring even in sleep. I rub his carapace gently and he flinches, whimpering softly. My heart breaks, he associates most touch with either pain or being dirty. My poor brother…how much I wish to tell you, you have no need to fear. I wish I could tell him the promise I made him.

It's six weeks later after Tiren removes Leo's bandages from his eyes that Leo gets to see me. He doesn't move at first and then, my heart dropping with them, his eyes flick downward, away from me. Fear tightens in my chest, he doesn't recognize me, how long I've ached to have my brother back and yet…even now…Leo doesn't know me. I feel my shoulders drop and seconds later I realize I'm running toward the river, that tears are flowing and I can't stop. When I finally stop running I sink to the ground and sob softly.

The next day I go to find Leo, he's sitting in the corner of Tiren's room, huddled up and clutching the jacket he's wearing tightly around him. Tiren is at his desk, he glances up as I come in.

"Hello Raphael," he greets, Leo must've told him my name, because I didn't.

I nod in greeting and turn to Leo, who seems to have curled tighter, like he's trying to force himself to become part of the wall. I walk over and nervously touch his shoulder. He turns toward me and then sobs, hugging himself tighter.

"…please," he whispers. I don't have to ask I see it in his eyes. He wants me to accept what he's become…it wasn't because he didn't recognize me that he looked away…it was because he was ashamed of his fears, of what he was now.

I pull him to me and hug him tight, I've waited so long to have my family close again, I'm not going to lose it again, just because of what happened to him.

"You…you don't…hate…me?" he weeps and then it all comes rushing back a screaming fight, angry words, violent attacks, leaving Leo sprawled on the roof of a building with those very words hanging over his head…I never went home that night…I ended up here.

I left Leo alone thinking those words and cutting him down all these years…and yet…it seems he still cares enough to want me around to comfort him.

Brother…I _love_ you and I will always be there for you. I shake my head and hug him tighter.

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	8. Chapter 8: Strength

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs" not except Aria and Gaeh and Yelgeh and the Plot**

**Chapter 8: Strength**

Leo is stronger than he looks…my jaw still hurts. He might be skinny as a twig still put weeks of Hauling work have given him the needed muscle he lacked before. He doesn't talk much. I just about gave him a heart attack though and that is why he hit me. Sheesh, I snuck up on him and was going to tickle him, forgot how jumpy he is about people coming up behind him. Need to definitely be more careful about that. He's just staring at the wall right now, like…like he's lost or something.

I finally found out the rest of the story behind the fight on the roof.

Master Splinter, our Otosan, our father, had just announced his stepping down from the role of head of our clan and had appointed Leo as it. I guess I was dead set against bowing to my own brother. I guess I…I refused to acknowledge Leo after that, shut him out and stopped listening. He confronted me that night on the roof…I guess he was willing to give me the title of Leader if…if I'd just come home. He was willing to give up everything he's trained for…to keep our family unified. I argued with him…called him weak…I broke my brother's heart that night…after I left him on the roof Leo never went home…he thought I had taken his offer so he…he didn't want to face Splinter. When he finally came home four days later, starving…Leo…he didn't eat during that time…he was so upset. Leo hoped I'd at least let him eat before he left, for good. He found out that I'd never come home. Master Splinter blamed him for my disappearance…made him swear he wouldn't come home unless…unless he brought me back with him…Leo's been looking for me for eight years…been a slave for five…suffered because…because I was…I was such a…I was so jealous…so angry…I stopped listening that night…and I condemned us both.

I glance over at Leo and fight tears…he…he still thinks…I hate him…that I'm only helping him because…it's what our father would want me to do. Every time I try to make eye contact he looks away…he…bows his head to me. After all this time…he's still willing to give that title up. Oh Leo…I'm so sorry. What did I do to you? It wasn't just the Foreman here that broke you…it was me. _I _broke my brother's spirit, the night I left him on that roof. I killed him that night, destroyed him.

I glance down at the cloth in my hands and fight tears. Oh Leo…Leo I'm so sorry, please forgive me…please. Let us be brothers again, best friends again.

I toss the cloth aside and grab Leo, dragging him to me in my desperation to get his forgiveness for that night. Aria and Gaeh stop playing and look toward us. Leo jerks away and tries to get as far away from me as he can. He fights back, then for the second time tonight…he hits me…it's worse than a hot-whip…I let him go and just sob, I reach for him, one hand held out to him. But he's turned away, huddled up inside the niche in the cave wall.

All I can do is weep, bitter and angry at myself. Aria comes up to me and touches my arm.

"Daddy?" she whispers.

I hug her close and weep all the harder as Gaeh hugs me too. Leo…Leo still doesn't know Gaeh is his son…or…at least he doesn't acknowledge him that way.

It's days later when I find Tiren and somehow manage to get my question across that I receive the best gifts I've ever known, paper and a pen.

They feel alien in my hands…like priceless jewels. Over the next four days I put forth my best effort to write out my story onto eight pieces of paper, squeezing as much as I can, struggling with spelling and then finally finish. The grammar is wrong, the words most likely incorrect but…I still give those precious papers to Leo, anxiously press them into his hands. I can still see the words in my head as he slowly reads.

_Leo…I hope spell name right…lost lot of memory. Can't talk now, hurt voice while back. Wanted to tell what happened and that I sorry. Please fogive? I sorry if hard read, I try. _

His hands tighten along the edges as he reads and slowly he starts crying, I ache to reach out to him, but dare not. As he turns the page and gets to the part about Gaeh he stops and looks over at the boy.

_Boy name Gaeh your boy, found him scared…my girl wanted him to have safe place. Mother died…he was lost. I help, find out yours later. _

Leo's lower lips trembles and he sobs, before turning back to the papers and he keeps reading.

_Never wanted you hurt…I sorry…want to help…please fogive? Want be friends again…brothers? Please? I so alone here…want family back…please?_

_Won't let them hurt you again…never…kill them first. _

He starts sobbing so hard he drops the papers without finishing and then turns to me and still sobbing he clings to me.

"I forgive you," he weeps.

I hug him tight and just cry with him, I feels good to have someone hug me. We just sit like that for a long time. Aria and Gaeh come over and hug us too. Leo pulls away and looks at Gaeh.

"I'm…I'm your father," Leo whispers.

Gaeh gives me a confused look and inches closer to me. Leo's shoulders drop and I see the agony in his eyes. He reaches weakly toward his son and begs him to come. Then Gaeh sees the numbers on Leo's arm and he touches them. He looks at Leo and then hugs him tight.

Leo finishes reading later that night and over the next few weeks he works hard to learn my sign language. It isn't long before he stops speaking unless he has to and we just communicate via sign and body language. Leo starts to find his strength again. I see him become less timid as the weeks pass, he stops being quite so jumpy, and he stands up to the foremen when Gaeh gets in the way. No one is going to mess with Leo when I'm around, not even a foreman. He gets more bold, but the nervous fear is always there. He panics easy when he gets backed into a corner and still jumps when someone comes up behind him, but all the same he…he's starting to heal.

"Raph!" Leo hisses.

I turn to him and grunt, raising an eye ridge. He points out over the other haulers and I freeze as a special bell tolls. That bell means that a buyer is willing to pay the extra amount to buy from the slaves that aren't destined for Sellers.

Leo pushes Gaeh behind him and I step in front of Leo and look at my feet as the men walk by. The whole world freezes as I hear my number called. I hear Leo give a soft cry and then I'm being dragged away.

I twist desperately, frantic to see my brother one last time. We make eye contact and I see the terror in his eyes. He knows as much as I do the second I'm gone…the foreman will start hurting him again. Then with everything I have left I make a signal to Leo, pleading with him to take care of my daughter.

I'll never see her again…my little girl, oh Aria…I'm so sorry.

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	9. Chapter 9: Sunlight

**Disclaimer: uh…no**

**Chapter 9: Sunlight**

I squint as light hit my eyes and grunt as I try to get my eyes to adjust to the brightness. Then as my eyes adjust I see it…the sky. For the first time in eight years. It's breathtaking. Despite my fear and worry over my family I can't get past how beautiful the sky is, a great expanse of light blue dotted with wisps of white, clouds I remember. Then I'm jerked forward again and find myself being forced into the back of a star-cruiser. I'm put in with a few others and my chains are attached to the wall. The fear and worry comes back. A young teripan woman is forced into the same section as me and she's chained too. She's sobbing and scared, I can see it in her blue eyes.

"Do…do you know where?" she whispers to me.

I shake my head. She crumples to the floor and starts sobbing.

"They killed him…he said he'd find a way to get us out…" she sobs.

Despite my own worry over my family I move toward her and croon in an attempt to comfort her, best I can. I grunt as I reach the end of my chains. She looks up and really looks at me for a second.

"I'm sorry…I thought for a second…I'm sorry," she whispers, "you…looked a little like him…at first."

I blink…can it be…? No Gaeh said his mother died, but as I look at her I see the resemblance. Though her skin tone and markings are all different, her face structure…

Copper-Gold hair, white-cream skin with sea turtle markings…yellow. Those eyes…large and expressive…like Gaeh's but…blue not Leo nor the boy's golden-brown.

"What is it?" she whispers, its then I realize I'm staring.

Before I can respond the doors close and the cruiser starts to move. She whimpers. I manage to sit down close to her and then croon softly. To my shock he leans into me and uses my shoulder to cry on. It makes sense now…Leo's lost…lonely look, the way he reacted to finding out he had a son. The Foremen must've figured out these two loved each other and separated them, told them that each other were dead. This, _this _woman is my brother's chosen life mate. If Leo knew…I'm sure he'd want me to take care of her, and I will.

Days pass in that cell and finally the cruiser lands, Nelari or Nel as she goes by sits up and looks out the window as she stands on her tip toes. Leo and I are definitely taller, but she acts as if she can see everything. She's got a little spunk, but she's mostly just a quiet little thing. I can see why Leo fell in love with her, she's beautiful, heck she's _smart_ for one thing, and she knows who to trust. I managed to get through to her that I can't speak but she keeps talking to me as if I could answer. I think she just wants to have noise so she doesn't feel so alone.

I grunt my question to her looking over her head.

"I can't tell," she whispers.

No really?

I sigh and crane my neck so far I nearly fall over. I never stop thinking about Aria, about Leo and Gaeh…and Yelgeh, the woman I've come to think of as my mother. Are they ok? Will my daughter be safe? Is Leo…still…safe? I shudder at the thought that he…that they might've hurt him again. After how long it took to build him back up…will his confidence vanish again?

"Muscles!" she hisses, my nickname.

Wonderful…isn't it? I grunt and look her way. Someone is coming down the hall, opening doors and letting the other slaves out.

They reach us and the door opens, Nel backs away and tries to get behind me. An old Human man comes in. he looks us over.

"It's alright," he whispers, "I promise you're both safe here…let me get those off of you."

He comes forward with the keys and to my shock he removes the chains from my wrists and ankles. I stare at the them on the floor and struggle to figure out the guys angle. What does he want?

"It's alright. Now couple things you should know," he says.

Oh boy here comes the angle.

"After a year of odd jobs around this farm you both are free," he says.

My jaw drops. _FREE?_ As in like FREE? I hear Nel gasp and glance at her before looking back at the man.

"As long as you abide by the rules here we'll have no problems. Oh and Hakn will show you both to the showers and help you get some clean clothes before dinner," he tells us, gesturing to a young Human man next to him.

Wait hold up…did he say a shower? Dinner?

Twenty minutes later I'm standing in the dinning area for the slaves/servants, in clean clothes and staring at the mountain of food on the table. At first I eat my fill then…I think of Aria, Leo, Gaeh, and Yelgeh…starving and feel sick. I get up and run, barely aware of the cries and protests of the others at the table. I find my way outside and double over as I spill my dinner onto the ground I drag the clean clothes off and with tears rolling down my cheeks, shame, anger, grief. How could I? they're so hungry…and I just…ate my fill. I weep and clutch my arms around my legs.

"Are you ok?" a girl's voice asks. I look up through bleary eyes and see her. She's about the same age as Nel but way different at the same instance. She has long, curly flame red hair, greenish-grey skin, and big golden eyes.

"Master Joban wanted me to make sure you were ok," she whispers, walking over to me. She's wearing a floor-length white gown and its _thin_. I can practically see straight through it as it moves against her. Why am I checking her out? I hate this place…one second I'm rejoicing in the fact that I have luxuries I haven't had in eight years, the next I think I'm betraying my family by enjoying it, and then I'm randomly checking a girl out.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

She touches my arm and I nearly jump out of my shell, despite the fact that it's physically impossible.

"I'm not going to hurt you," she teases.

No but you'll drive me insane…

"What's wrong?" she asks, sitting beside me.

I glare at the dirt by my boots, then it clicks. I lean forward and write out:

_Family hurting still_

"Oh…" she breathes.

"Can you speak?" she asks.

I shake my head sharply and fight tears.

"Come on," she urges and then grabs my arm and drags me to my feet.

The fact that I'm naked doesn't seem to faze her…did she just? Oh help me…please. I've had enough experience with women to know I don't _ever_ want to become attached or wooed. Leo must've been cracked when he fell in love with Nel.

"Let's…get you some new stuff," she says. I shake my head and pull on the ragged clothing. Until my family is safe I'll wear the dirty clothing here.

"Ok…" she murmurs, "Let's go talk to Joban."

Um…I _can't_ talk.

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	10. Chapter 10: Waiting

**Disclaimer: ??? YOU thought I owned them? I mean besides the OCs? "laughs"**

**Chapter 10: Waiting**

Master Joban had me write out my family's Identification Numbers so he could find them. Its been three weeks since then. Now I'm on my knees scrubbing the floor in the main hall, anxiously glancing up to see if any of the new slaves are my family…none of them are. Joban promised…he promised. I have to keep reminding myself of that. I've barely eaten since coming here. If my family has to starve still…so will I. I'm aware that I'm crying and quickly wipe my eyes before returning to scrubbing the floors.

"Raph?" its Nel, she knows my name now, but I haven't told her much else.

What's the point of getting her hopes up too? If Joban can't get them, it'll kill her. I realize I'm crying still and fight the tears and try to wipe them away.

Nel stops me, makes me look at her.

"What's wrong?" she whispers.

I sob and shake my head, pulling away.

"He can't talk," a woman says. I glance her way and realize its Fuira, the woman who followed me out the first night.

"I know," Nel snaps, "I just-"

"You really should get back to work," Fuira cuts off, "Just because-"

I stand up and separate them with my bulk. What the hell is up with these two? Then it hits me and its all I can do to stay standing…they're fighting over _me_. Nel first of all is Leo's mate…and Fuira well…I'm not exactly up for a relationship right now…I think Nel is more just trying to have someone to turn to, she's still mourning Leo. Fuira…on the other hand…they're arguing again.

I let out a wordless shout and they both stop talking. I grab the notepad at my belt and scribble two notes and hand them off, before turning to get the bucket of soapy water and the scrub brush and move to another spot.

Nel gets real quiet.

_Leo alive._

And Fuira, I hear her leave.

_Stop. _

Three words on two papers and suddenly I feel very alone. Then I feel a hand on my carapace.

"Raph?" she whispers.

I turn my head to acknowledge her.

"Leo…you're…the brother?" she whispers.

I nod.

"You're the one who…who hurt him so bad?" she whispers.

I drop my head and sit down and pull the notepad out again. Hands shaking I write out a few words.

_Met up. Forgive. We brothers again._

She reads it silently and then sits beside me and hugs me.

"He never gave up on wanting to find you. He so desperately wanted you to come home. You two…" she whispers I stop her and give her a hug.

"Is he…ok?" she sobs.

I struggle with that answer and force myself to nod.

The next day I'm standing at the board where we get our daily assignments when I heard shouting and the sound of someone running.

"HEY COME BACK!" I hear Hakn shout.

At lot of us are shoved aside as Hakn and the other freed men chase after the figure. I crane my neck to see who it is and then freeze.

Joban is shouting for me.

"RAPHAEL! IT'S YOUR BROTHER! YOU HAVE TO STOP HIM BEFOE HE HITS SVGAR'S FENCE!"

I start sprinting. Svgar is Joban's neighbor on the edge of the forest. His fence is laced with electric wires and neural scramblers. You hit that fence and…you either die…or end up brain dead. There is a five foot separation between Joban's wooden fence and Svgar's fence. I see the other men ahead of me trying to keep up with Leo. I jump the narrow pasture fence and charge across for a short cut, the horses in the pasture bolt and start running with me. I break out of the forest and spot Leo charging toward _that_ fence and the freed men scrambling over Joban's. Leo jumps up onto the fence and I hear him scream before I tackle him and knock him off.

I drag Leo to me and scream myself, from the short exposure to that fence. Leo is thrashing in my arms and then…he goes limp and everything goes black for me a second later.

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	11. Chapter 11: Epidemic

**Disclaimer:**** Uh…no.**

**Hang onto your britches guys…its going to get bumpy.**

**Chapter 11: Epidemic**

Leo was sick…the whole place where I used to be in is sick…Leo is so thin…so frail right now. He's running a fever, the injuries he received from Svgar's fence aren't helping him. Leo's coughing up blood and he can't keep anything down, not even water. Our kids are still back there… they might be dead by now if…I think about it. How sick all those people back there must be. Leo…the doctors…they say he might not make it. To top it off…the disease had struck here too. A lot of us are getting sick. I…I started getting dizzy and sick to my stomach late last night. I'm with Leo right now, holding his hand and begging him to pull through.

I glance over the oxygen mask and IV stand, those two things are keeping him alive…that's it. There's flecks of blood in the mask. He's dying…oh he's dying and there's nothing I can do about it. My daughter…my sweet little angel might be dead already…it scares me, I can't describe the fear…the agony that her death would bring me. Nel is with the ones that are healthy, us sick are quarantined away from the others. She's been trying to get in to see Leo for a while now but they won't let her in here.

I lay here, next to Leo and just hope…somehow…we make it and that our kids do too…

_Cold water…screams of agony and fear. A dead body…Leo…sprawled limp, eyes open and lifeless…blood everywhere. I turn and Aria is the same way…icy cold as I lift her, eyes empty, blood around her nostrils and mouth._

_Gaeh and Yelgeh also dead…_

_PLEASE NO!_

I weave in and out of nightmares for days, shivering as I surface and fight to stay there, unbearable cold…burning heat. I taste blood, my lungs are on fire and my whole body hurts. I shiver before my eyes flutter closed and I again am swallowed by nightmares. I catch a glimpse of someone sitting beside me before I slip away.

_Ice…so cold…fire…the smell of death, of fear, the agony of my lungs being consumed. Blood in my mouth…choking…gagging…drowning…I'm being held under, someone's laughing._

"Raph," I hear, "shhhh."

I struggle to open my eyes. My body feels like it ways a ton, my head is so heavy. My body refuses to listen or respond. Everything hurts and aches.

"Shhh…lad you're alright," I hear again.

Then, finally, I get my eyes open a little and manage to catch a glimpse of who is sitting beside me….then exhaustion drags me back under and I slip back into darkness. Just one thought crosses my mind before I'm gone…Yelgeh?

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	12. Chapter 12: Flickering Hope

**Disclaimer: Uh…and yet I still don't own them…hmmm…**

**Chapter 12: Flickering Hope**

The next time I manage to open my arms I find myself across from Leo and cuddled up with…ARIA! My daughter, my little girl. I start to move and then freeze as Leo whimpers and my aching body protests. Leo has his arms wrapped around me and I have my own around him, with Gaeh and Aria between us.

Our kids, my daughter and my nephew…they're…here…safe. Suddenly I feel drained of any strength again and feel my eyes flutter closed.

"Raph?" I hear as I stir, and drag my heavy eye lids open.

It's Leo…he looks so tired.

"Are…you ok?" I hear him whisper.

I struggle to nod and then feel myself slump again, exhausted.

"Yeah…I'm tired too. They said we were really sick," he murmurs and sags back against the pillows.

"You two should be resting," I hear…it's Yelgeh.

I struggle to turn to her and she presses me back into the pillows.

"Shhh, rest. You both had a rough couple weeks," she murmurs.

WEEKS?!?

I nearly sit bolt upright and I see Leo start to sit up to.

"REST!" she orders and I flop back onto the pillows, Leo beside me.

Wait…where's Aria? ARIA!!!! I try to scramble up and end up being pushed down again. Then I hear Leo laughing weakly.

"They're playing with the other kids," Leo whispers.

I relax and sag back, letting sleep take me.

Three days later I'm sitting up on the porch with Leo next to me, watching the kids playing in the yard.

"Raph?" he asks.

I glance his way and grunt.

"I…-" he whispers.

I look at him and notice that his hands are clutching his blanket. Then I understand as he starts crying.

"I…I'm so scared Raph…I just…not as strong as I used to be," Leo whimpers, "I can't do this…do…do you remember what we were raised to live by?"

I struggle for a minute and nod.

"Bushido, the Code of Honor," he murmurs, "Raph…I…have no honor…my son…has no honor…what they did to me…I-"

I drag him close realizing suddenly that my brother…can never go home. I press him against me and simply hug him. Because it all comes back…the Code we were raised by, the way we lived. Leo lost everything the first time they rapped him, took his right to come home, to be himself.

Leo I won't leave you alone…I promise.

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	13. Chapter 13: Healing

**Disclaimer: BUHAHAHAHAHAHA! Wait…why am I laughing again? Oh yeah…cause I don't own the cannon characters, just the OCs and the Plot**

**Chapter 13: Healing**

I'm sprawled out under a willow tree with Leo next to me, like the others who were sick it's one day at a time for us. We push it too hard and we'll have a relapse. A few others did and they got so sick that they didn't make it.

"Raph?" Leo asks.

"Hmmm?" I manage.

I open one eye as I hear giggling and inwardly groan as a few girls walk by. I grumble in annoyance and look toward Leo. He's grinning…_grinning_. I glare at him and he snorts in laughter and rolls onto his plastron, carapace toward the branches above us. He drops his chin to his hands. He only feels really comfortable with his back to me, anyone else and he'd get all jumpy.

"Joban said a year right?" he asks, glancing my way. I nod and roll over to my plastron as well.

"What…what do you want to do after we're free?" he asks, I see it then the fear, the dread. He…he's convinced our father won't ever let him come home and that as soon as I'm free…that I'll leave him alone.

I find my notebook and the pen I keep tucked in my belt.

_Whatever you want brother. I'll stay with you._

I press it into his hands and wait, I hear the hitch in his breathing and glance his way.

"Why?" Leo whispers, "You could go home see Don and Mikey…give Aria a chance to know her uncles her grandfather…why would you cut yourself off from-"

I stop him by pressing my finger to his lips and shake my head. I write out another note.

_I nearly destroyed our friendship once. Broke you down, you are still my leader and my older brother. I'll wait for you to come home before I do._

He gets really quiet and just looks at me.

"You changed a lot Raph," he whispers, "Some days I'm not entirely sure it's you."

I shrug and roll over onto my carapace again, arms folded under my head. I see Leo shake his head and smile.

"Would…you like to stay here? You know help Joban?" Leo whispers.

I tap the first note and smile at him. He gives me a weak smile, absently playing with the grass below him.

"Alright, I want to help the slaves that come here and find that they can be free again," Leo whispers.

I nod in agreement and close my eyes content to remain still.

"OOOFF" I grunt as something heavy hits me. Seconds later I hear Leo yelp in panic and then start laughing. I open my eyes to find Aria grinning at me, I blow a lock of hair from her face and smile at her. I never thought I see her again and yet here she is, my little angel. Gaeh is sitting on Leo's carapace chattering away in unintelligent conversation into his father's ear.

"Daddy!" Gaeh demands.

"What is it little mister?" Leo teases gently, he's the most at ease with Gaeh, the most relaxed I ever see him.

"I found pretty stones!" he gasps, leaning over to hand Leo some stones.

That kid and stones, I don't get it.

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**Reviews Please?**


	14. Chapter 14: Finding Our Niche

**Disclaimer:**** AND "skips through the forest" …oh…wait….I forgot to say I don't own the cannon characters and you know the rest of the drill….heh.**

**AND BACK TO THE STORY!!!!!! "skips off"**

**Chapter 14: Finding Our Niche**

The past few weeks have given Leo and I our strength back and Leo's _finally_ put on some weight. He no longer looks like a twig with a huge shell anymore. After being here a certain amount of time we're supposed to be able to find our niche, where we work best. Leo has yet to figure out where he wants to work for the next year but I've figured out that I like working the fields, cutting lumber, and fixing the fences around the property. Leo mostly does odd jobs around here for now.

"RAPH!" I hear someone call, "WATCH OUT!"

I jump aside as a dark stallion charges at me and just misses kicking my left leg. I grunt as I land and twist around in time to see Leo jump in front of Gaeh and shout while waving his arms frantically.

The stallion rears and my heart drops. It drops down in front of Leo and I see the stallion's ears flick toward Leo for a moment and then back and he snorts, pacing and pawing at the ground.

Leo slowly reaches forward and keeps talking. The stallion makes an attempt to bite Leo's hand and I see Leo jerk it back quickly.

Gaeh looks scared, he's behind Leo and clutching the leg of Leo's pants.

For the first time in years I see the brother I remember; stern, proud, and brave. All I can do is stand here and hope nothing bad happens. Then to all of our relief the stallion stills and lets Leo grab its halter. After someone comes to get the stallion, Leo scoops up Gaeh and clutches him close, I rush over and realize then how bad Leo is shaking and place a comforting hand on his arm. He gives me a nervous look and a weak smile but after a few minutes the two of them stop shaking. Two days later the stallion, a blue-roan I later learn is still untamed and in the same pasture.

I walk out there and find Leo sitting inside the fence, just watching that stallion and as I get closer I realize Leo's talking to it.

"I'm not going to hurt you. It's ok, you're safe here. Joban's really kind. I've got scars like you. Joban is a good man," Leo whispers.

The stallion's ears keep flicking toward Leo and it shifts nervously as I lean against the railing.

"He won't come to me if you're around," Leo whispers, "he gets spooked easy."

I grunt and nod, smiling at Leo…he found his niche. I'll let him be for now. who would've figured my big brother would want to work with horses when he used to think only of using his swords, of training until he could hardly stand?

….

The next day I walk out to check on Leo, Aria and Gaeh walking along with me. We find Leo asleep and that stallion grazing contently next to him. That stallion looks up and snorts at us, before trotting off to the other side of the pasture. Leo sits up and glances at us.

"Come on," he tells me as he hops over and picks up Gaeh.

What is he up to now?

* * *

Reviews Please?

The stallion: .com/136006_1/roan_nokota_


	15. Chapter 15:Horseback Riding & Uniting

**Disclaimer:**** Just the OCS and the Plot!!!**

**Chapter 15: Learning to Horseback Ride and Reuniting a Family**

Reminder…saddles _hurt_ the crotch. I'm _never_ going to let Leo forget how much pain he just put me through…he insisted that I _must_ learn with him. Hover cars and cruisers might be common but horses are more often used. Less chance of knocking things over and horses are more agile, they can get into certain places better, hence Joban's keeping them, plus the fact that most of the horses on this farm, are racers. Including that stallion, hence Leo's desire to learn to ride…and my sore body…

Leo is sitting next to me at the lunch table, looking for all the world as happy as can be. Gaeh is sitting between Leo and I, the kid is trying to cut his sandwich in half, much to both my and Leo's humor. Leo leans over and helps him, the blue jacket he's taken to wearing matches Gaeh's jacket. Aria is beside me, chattering about the kids she's been playing with all day, kids…the second they set foot on this property they are free. Free to run and play and be kids. Nothing more than that, they don't have to work, they don't have to worry about their next meal, they just get to be…kids.

I can't help but smile at Aria as she tells me all about the games she's been playing. She knows I'm listening, even if I don't write out a response.

I glance up and spot Nel and freeze…Leo…I never told him. She's standing with some other women looking lost and miserable. I get up and gesture for Aria to stay there. Leo looks up and gives me a confused look.

"Raph?" he asks.

I grin at him and shrug. He gives me a weird look and starts to say something before I turn away. I get over to Nel and tap her shoulder to get her attention. She ignores me the first time and then after I tap her arm again she looks at me.

"What?-oh…hi Raph," she whispers, giving me an apologetic look.

I shrug it off and then grab her arm and tug her toward the table.

"What?" she insists, "Ok…hang on…-I'll be back girls," she calls over her shoulder.

I lead her over to the table and plant her in front of Leo, who has returned to helping Gaeh with his meal. Gaeh freezes when he sees Nel and his eyes get big. Nel gasps and stares back at him.

"Mommy?" Gaeh whimpers.

That does it, Leo looks up and gasps, his fork hitting the plate.

"Nel?" he breathes.

"Leo," she whispers.

I swear Leo just about leaps through the table to get to her. He pulls her into a hug and just pulls her tight, tears streaming down his cheeks. She leans into him and they stay like that for a few seconds before Nel pulls away and looks at Gaeh.

"MOMMY" Gaeh shrieks as he hugs her, Nel lifts him up and just holds him close.

"Oh baby…my little one," she weeps.

Aria gives them a confused look and then looks at me expectantly. My heart drops into my stomach…she wants to know where her mother is…how will…how can I tell her? I struggle to work out how to tell her that in the end I just shake my head and she…she looks like her whole world shattered. I feel horrible…like…how do I explain the feeling? Like a massive weight just rested itself on my shoulders and I know it'll never come off. Will Aria hate me for what I did?

My thoughts are interrupted by Leo. He hugs me and thanks me…but whatever joy I felt moments ago at uniting them is gone. Suddenly I feel very alone.

"Raph?" Leo says softly, he notices me looking at Aria and then gets quiet.

"You'll find her," he murmurs, he thinks I fell in love like he did. He doesn't know the truth. Would he hate me too if he knew?

The weight gets heavier and I feel lost, my heart aching for the joy Leo has, and yet…I don't know if I want that either. I'm being torn two ways.

I start to go to Aria and she just looks away.

Please no.

She goes out with the other kids, waiting a few seconds to see if Gaeh is coming and then turns when she realizes that he's going to stay with his mother.

I whimper as she leaves and feel the weight beginning to crush me.

"Raph?" Leo whispers, turning me toward him, "What's-Raph?"

I pull away and walk out to go to my next job for the day, fighting tears and feeling my heart shatter in my chest. Will I lose my daughter so soon after getting her back? Will my child hate me? I can't take that…what will I tell her?

I hear him start to follow and then Gaeh call out to him, Nel ask him something and then he stops following. Somehow that hurts more than him knowing why I'm so upset.

Over the next few hours I vent my anger and pain against the logs I have to split for the furnaces and wood stoves that cook our meals. Joban is dead set against moving to electric stoves, he likes the flavor that wood smoke gives the food.

Personally so do I.

I lift a log and set it on the place where it needs to sit and then swing the ax as hard as I can, feeling the heavy metal drive through the wood. If only my problems and pain could be taken care of so easily. A quick cut and gone.

…

That night after another Ridding lesson and a strained dinner with my family, I crawl into the bunk I have and reach down to help Aria up. She doesn't come.

"Daddy…where's my mommy?" she whispers.

I feel tears start and reach for her again. She steps back and then gives me an angry look.

"Where's my mommy?" she begs.

I feel my heart stop and close my eyes. Please baby just come to me…don't break me like this.

Then someone puts her up on the bunk beside me. I open my eyes to find her sitting beside me and Leo standing beside the bunk. Aria won't look at me and as I reach for her she pulls away.

"Aria…you've hurt your dad today," Leo whispers softly.

Aria looks at me then and sees the tears.

"Daddy?" she whispers and then hugs me, "I'm sorry."

I hug her tight and struggle to know if I'll lose her again after I tell her the truth. I'll go mad if my daughter chooses to hate me. I couldn't handle that, the weight feels even heavier, and I fear I'll break under it.

Leo gets up on his old bunk beside me and waits until Aria is asleep. Where are Nel and Gaeh? I see that bunk and wonder who will take his place, what stranger will soon be sleeping beside me. Then I hear Leo say something and look at him.

"Is she dead?" he asks softly.

Blunt, to the point. He wants to know, but his eyes tell me its more of a worry, like he's desperate to help me. I hesitate before answering, desperate to hold on as long as possible to the friendship I've built with my brother. Losing my daughter's love with break me…losing my brother's will kill me. I struggle and lock eyes with him before making my decision. I close my eyes and nod.

Then as I straighten my daughter's hair and lay her down as I pull out my pad of paper and my pen. Then with my hands shaking and tears falling I write out what happened and hand it to Leo. Dreading the anger, the shock, the fear, that must come…that I know will come.

He doesn't say anything for a while and then, reaches across and touches my arm. I can't help but flinch, fearing for his anger.

_she left Aria to die...I...I killed her mother._

Then I hear what he's saying.

"You protected your daughter, I would never hate you for that," he says softly, "After all you've done for me…how could I? Raph…you accepted me at my worst, gave me hope again. You said you'd stay with me why would I walk out on you?"

I sob and feel the crushing weight lessen.

I sign my thanks to him. Then he does a sign that we came up with together. One hand touched to his chest, over the heart, and the other extended toward me after touching the one over his heart. _Brothers. _

Then I see Nel heading this way with a sleepy Gaeh hugged tight and she gets up on the bunk beside Leo and settles down for the night. We're still a family, still a family.

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Thanks for those REVIEWS that I know are coming today…. "eyes all of you" hmmm?


	16. Chapter 16: News

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs"…. **

**Chapter 16: News **

Its been three weeks since I told Leo about Aria's mother. I've helped replace all of the fence posts around the main pastures and I'm currently attempting to help the others pull in the rest of the hay for the year. Winter's fast in coming and we can all feel the cold creeping past our coats and gloves. I stomp my feet to keep the blood flowing and reach to take hold of another bale. Leo and the other men are out here too, even Joban and his son help during this time of year.

The others are singing.

"Ha kai na le la leh sah meh…nah ha…gah joa…na le la leh…kai ha ne ha le…a seira, a seira, a seira!"

I have absolutely no clue what they are saying but the tune is catchy. It's like…dum dum…da da da…dum…dum da…di dum and it repeats like the words do. It helps keep us on pace and passes the time I guess.

Leo is singing with the others, I'm just humming along. I spot Aria playing with the other kids and grin as she starts to wrestle with another kid. She…she still doesn't know about her mother yet, but I'll…I'll tell her soon, even if she hates me for what I did, she deserves to know about what happened.

Someone is shouting and running this way.

"JOBAN! THERE'S A BLIZZARD COMING WE NEED TO GET INSIDE!!!" the man shouts.

We all pause and glance at Joban he looks over his shoulder.

"We've got two bales, let's get them in quick and head in. LEONARDO TAKE WYNDR AND TELL THE MEN IN THE FIELDS TO HEAD IN!" Joban orders we start moving instantly.

Leo drops down and rushes toward the stables to pull the blue-roan stallion out of his stall. I catch sight of Leo leaping onto the stallion's back and then charging off toward the fields.

We manage to get the last bales in and then head inside, I stand in the doorway waiting for Leo to come. I see the other men from the fields coming in, but not Leo. Fear takes hold and I grip the wall.

"Daddy?" I hear Aria ask, I glance down and see her waiting for me to come in. Then I spot Nel and Gaeh watching me. I feel sick, where's Leo? The wind is starting to pick up and the temperature has already dropped, my hands are freezing already…Leo isn't dressed any better than I am and he's ridding a horse that's running. The trees begin to twist as their branches thrash in the wind. I grit my teeth and drag the door closed before picking up Aria and hold her to me. I hand her off to Nel and pull out the letter I had written for Aria a while back. I press it into Nel's hands and then write out a note for her.

_I have to find Leo, if I don't come back, give this to my daughter. Please._

I press it into Nel's hands and then hug Aria one last time. That letter will tell her about her mother and what I did, I only hope she reads on to know how much I love her how much I want her to accept me.

"Raph? You can't!" Nel calls as I step out into the storm.

I fright to close the door and as it closes I hear Aria calling for me.

"DADDY DON'T GO! DADDY!" it tears my heart apart but I _have_ to find my brother.

The wind tears at my jacket and I gasp as the cold air hits my neck. As I look around all I see is white…snow…I struggle to get my bearings.

Building is behind me.

Woods to the left.

Fence straight ahead.

I walk straight until I reach the fence and use it to guide myself over to the barn. From there I can get to the woods but first I need to start one of the hover cars that is small enough to move through the area. A horse will only spook and be as lost as me out here.

I gasp as the wind nearly rips my coat away. Its _cold_ out here. My hands are going numb and I struggle to get the door open.

Then it opens and smacks me as the wind catches it. I yelp, my head pounding. I grab the door and drag it closed behind me, fighting the wind. Finally I get it closed and sink to the ground of the barn. I tip my head back and touch my forehead, wincing as I pull my hand back and find blood.

I have to find Leo.

I stumble to my feet and move down the aisle. The horses move toward me as I pass, wanting my attention.

Then I see them, the sleek, small two passenger hover cars. I stumble toward them, feeling dizzy and open one up and climb in.

My head is pounding now and my stomach isn't doing so well. I think I'm going into shock, must've hit my head harder than I thought.

I start the vehicle and then push the button that will open the door for these cars. The wind screams as the door opens. Then I realize my mistake…a hover car is light weight…the wind.

But I have to, Leo will need to be warm. I grit my teeth and slam the bar into high gear. I'm out of the building and heading for the woods seconds later. I just manage to hit the button to close the door before I'm out of range.

The lights show me a tree just in time and I jerk the wheel to allow me to miss it. I turn on, after a few moments of frustrated searching, the inferred and solid sensors, putting the vehicle into Autopilot. I sit back and fight to remain calm. Head pounding, I look out the window searching the front windshield's inferred scanning screen for Leo.

Then out of the blue I spot two figures that can only be my brother and that stallion. I grab the gear and slow down, managing to stop thirty feet from the huddled figures.

I scramble out, whistling frantically, to get his attention. He doesn't move.

I scramble closer and drop down beside him.

"Raph?" the wind catches it and drags it away, I barely catch it.

I grab his arm and pull him after me. He staggers after me and tries to bring the stallion with him.

I don't know how I convince him to let go or even how we find the hover car and get back in. We huddle there and shiver, I make sure the heat is all the way up and then drag him close. I feel the vehicle moving in the wind, and shudder every time we hit the tree next to us.

I think I passed out after awhile because I don't remember coming home. But when I wake up back at the bunk house I'm wrapped in blankets and my head is bandaged up. I start to roll over and feel my head pound. I can't stop the moan that escapes my lips.

"Shhh," I hear whispered, even so it still hurts my head.

I manage to open my eyes and find Yelgeh beside me.

She is dressed in the warmer clothes that Joban gives out to all of us for the winter. I nearly forgot she's here, she works in the main house, cooking and working on sewing and other such items. I only really see her during meal times and then she's with the other women.

I start to turn my head and another voice reaches my ears.

"Stop moving Raph," it's Leo.

I stop and let my eyes flick toward the sound of his voice.

He's wrapped in a thick blanket and sitting up in his bunk. Gaeh is curled in his lap, sound asleep, one hand grasping the hand of his father.

"You're an idiot," he teases, but I see the smile.

I manage a weak smile back and then nervously move my arm to see if Aria is near me, she's not.

"You two were out there for two days before the storm died down. Nel gave Aria the letter she was very upset…" Yelgeh whispers.

I can't stop the whimper of agony. No…please no…

My heart is breaking, there's a hole there now. I don't hear the rest of what they say, I just roll over and sob.

Over the next two days, I refuse to leave my bunk, dreading the sight of my daughter's anger, her hate. My cringe every time someone tries to speak to me.

It's late the second night when I hear someone walk up to my bunk. I drag myself further under the covers and just lay there, dreading a confrontation.

Someone climbs up onto the bunk and sits on the edge.

"D-daddy? Are you mad at me?" it's Aria…my little girl.

I slowly drag myself out of the covers and look at her.

"You…never came to see me…" she whimpers, tears streaming down her cheeks, "Daddy?"

I move forward and hug her tight. I never finished listening…oh what did they try to tell me that night?

….

The next day I finally venture out of the bunk house, with Aria on my shoulders.

"Daddy…Nelari said the white stuff is snow. Is it cold?" she chatters.

I can't help but smile at her. Remembering that she's never seen snow before now.

I spot Leo, Nel, Gaeh, and Yelgeh at a table in the dinning hall and move over toward them.

"AUNTIE NEL!" Aria shrieks, " MY DADDY'S BETTER!"

I flinch…oh my head…ow…ow…ow.

Leo laughs and gets up to greet me.

"Better?" he asks.

"Yep all better!" Aria exclaims.

I chuckle and drag her off my shoulders, tickling her as I set her down. She giggles and squirms, lightly smacking at my hands.

"Daddy stop!" she gasps.

I chuckle and let her go. She grabs Gaeh and drags him over to the other kids.

"She was really upset when I read the note to her, but not at you Raph…she was upset that her mother didn't want her," Nel whispers.

I flinch and drop my head a little. Leo claps a hand on my shoulder, giving me a soft smile.

"But when I read on, she…Raph she all she could think about was showing you how much she wanted you to be her father and always be there for you. Raph she loves you, for now her thoughts about a mother are gone, who knows later on. But for now…Raph…she's not mad at you for what you did," Nel whispers.

I glance at Yelgeh, who smiles back.

"She's a good child Raphael and you are a good father," she murmured.

Leo hugs me and I smile, clinging to him for comfort.

"Come on," Leo urges, turning down the hall.

I raise an eye ridge at Yelgeh and Nel before starting to follow.

"Joban wanted to talk to you when you got up," Nel says.

Oh boy…what's going to happen…will I have to work longer for damaging the hover car? My stomach twists nervously.

I follow Leo in and find Joban sitting in his study.

"Thank-you Leonardo," he tells my brother.

Leo grins and pats my shoulder as he leaves

Wait he's leaving? What's going on here?

"Raphael, I wanted to ask you something," he starts.

I'm nervous enough already just get on with it.

"There is a surgery that might give you back your voice. But the cost is a great deal, and I would have to ask you to stay here and help out another year," he continues, "I want to know if you want to try this."

I can't move, I'm too shocked. Slowly I manage to get my body to respond and nod.

I want to be able to speak to my daughter, to my brother, to my family.

* * *

Reviews Please? The more reviews the faster I update.


	17. Chapter 17: Training and A Letter

**Disclaimer: "Sighs" I disincline to acutest your request…that means no.**

**Chapter 17: Training and A Letter**

Ninjitsu the fighting style Leo and I were taught from infancy…and the fighting style I'm having trouble remembering. Leo is finally almost himself again, he gets nervous every once in a while, but overall he can handle a lot more contact than he used to. I know that he and Nel haven't become intimate yet.

How?

Scent. If they had their scents would be mixed together and they aren't mixed yet. Leo…what he went through with those foremen, I understand if he isn't ready to move past simply holding her. Nel thankfully is patient with him, she knows the whole story now, what happened to him.

Leo's accepted the fact that he more than likely won't be able to go home, I know he wants to though. He misses Don and Mikey as much as I do. We _both_ want to be able to go home. Honestly I'm furious over the fact that our father might not let Leo come home over being forced and molested. Yeah Leo lost his honor because of that but still, it wasn't like he didn't fight back.

"Raph!" Leo snaps.

I jump and then give Leo a grin. He shakes his head and rolls his eyes at me. He asked Joban if we would be allowed to train since another storm has locked all of us inside.

Joban gave us the go ahead, so we've moved a few bunks out of the way and cleared a space to train on. The others have made room for Leo and I to practice. Aria and Gaeh are perched on top of one with Nel to watch.

Over the next few minutes Leo helps me remember the basic moves I've nearly forgotten. He stops me all the sudden and grabs my wrist.

"Lock it," he says, "Lock the wrist at this point."

I've forgot more than I thought, it takes me three tries before I get it right. Thankfully Leo us encouraging and doesn't rub it in. Then finally we get to the stuff I remember. Hand to hand fighting.

Leo comes at me and tries to sweep my feet out from under me, I manage to jump in time and throw a punch at him. He dodges it and for a second I lose him. I pause confused and then get a cuff across the side of the head. Grumbling I manage to throw a spin kick and send him toward the wall. To which he lands in a crouch, grinning like an idiot and obviously enjoying our sparring.

About an hour later we stop, panting and sweating. After helping the others put back the bunks Leo and I head for the showers. Aria begs to sit on my shoulders and I lift her up to her delight.

"My Daddy is a warrior!" she tells everyone as we pass.

I chuckle a little. Leo told her that, told her that I used to fight bad guys all the time to protect people.

"Daddy!" Gaeh shouts as he rushes past to get Leo's attention. Leo stops, drops into a crouch and lets Gaeh up on his carapace. Gaeh is the _only_ person Leo will do that for. Aria can't even get a piggy-back ride out of him, and he _never_ crouches around anyone else.

Not even me.

He'll lay down next to me or turn his back to me but not crouch. That's when the Foremen would attacked him, that's when they'd rape him. When he let his guard down.

I drop down and let Aria get off as I step into the shower. Gaeh is sitting on the bench, legs swinging as he chatters with his dad.

"Daddy will you teach me?" he asks.

I see a tear roll down Leo's cheek. He wants to teach his son…but doesn't have permission by his own Master…and never will if he doesn't go home. I don't even have permission to teach Aria what I have.

Something in me snaps.

If Leo can't go home…if he wants his son to learn Ninjitsu then why can't he?

"I…can't buddy," Leo whispers.

"WHY NOT?" Gaeh gasps, "But…Daddy!"

"I Can't-" Leo starts.

I cut him off and shove a note into his hands.

_Teach him. I'll deal with Splinter if he throws a fit._

I see the gratitude in his eyes. But then I realize something. We aren't planning on even going home, so our father will never even know about it. Then I feel a pang of regret.

Don and Mikey most likely think we're dead by now. They at least deserve to know we're alive.

I sigh and as I finish my shower I figure out how to at least let my family know we're alive. At least if Joban is willing to pay the fee to send a letter all the way to Earth.

Then I make my way to Joban's office, Aria on my shoulders.

He agreed, he said he'd send it as soon as the blizzard stopped. Paper is pressed against the table Joban said I could use and pen lightly cradled in my hand. I glance up as Aria moves toward the book case. She's never seen books before. Leo walks in and gives me a confused look.

I scratch out a note.

_I want Don and Mikey to know we're alive._

To my shock Leo jerks the papers away.

"No," he whispers…begs.

"He'll make me go back…Raph if he knows about my loss of honor…I'll have to…" he says frantically.

He doesn't have to finish, I remember. Seppuku, ritual suicide. Leo will have to kill himself.

I drop the pen and grip my head, hands shaking. I feel his hand on my shoulder and look up.

"It's ok," he whispers, but I see it in his eyes, fear. He was truly scared a moment ago and is still worried about what our father would think. Leo used to live for our father's praise, now he fears for our fathers rage. Then nervously I write out something else.

_What if he never finds out? We don't have to tell him._

Leo stares at the note and then nervously looks at me. He's shaking.

"Raph…I…we can't lie…" he breaths.

_I'll never tell him. Leo he doesn't have to know. We…everything will be alright._

"I…Raph I can't…he makes me tell him everything from all our missions. He'll want to know about our scars…our brands, everything. Raph I can't lie…he'll know. I'm not strong enough," Leo pleads.

I get up and wrap an arm around him, pulling him close. He's going to have a panic attack if he doesn't calm down.

Did your father really drill Leo that much? No wonder he stressed so much, worried about us so much. He'd have to tell our father everything that happened on a patrol or mission. I can feel him shaking.

"Raph I _can't_. Please I'm not strong enough. I want Gaeh grow up without being shunned by his grandfather. I want to _see_ him grow up. Raph please don't write them. _Please_," he begs me, pleads that I don't reach out to our family.

I can't help but wonder what he thinks Don and Mikey will do or think. Gently I make him look at me before writing out another note.

_What about Don and Mike? Do they deserve to think we're dead? Do they deserve to think that we might've abandoned them?_

I see the tears on his cheeks and hear him sob.

Then I realize how scared he is, scared of losing his family after gaining them again. Like I was scared of losing Aria because of what I did to her mother.

I ache to hear my brothers' voices again, but dare I risk Leo's life? His sanity?

"Raph…I…you said you'd stay here with me…" he whispers it, he's still shaking.

I did say that…I promised him I'd be at his side.

_Of course I will. I just wanted them to know we're alive. They'll never find us Leo. I'll have Joban hide the return address. They'll have no way to figure out where we are._

He gets very still and nervously fingers the papers.

"Ok," it's so soft I barely hear it, practically a whisper.

"Daddy?" Aria asks.

I turn to her and Leo looks her way.

"What's wrong with Uncle Leo?" she whispers.

"I…Aria I was just scared," he whispers to her.

"Of what?" she asks.

"Being hurt," he whispers.

I grip his arm and he looks at me, before turning back to Aria. She looks confused.

"But you said you used to fight bad guys all the time…and…you won. Why would you be scared of getting hurt?" she asks.

He just freezes and then looks thoughtful, if not a little sad.

"When someone cares about someone else very much they…they don't want to get hurt because it would cause the people they care about to be hurt," Leo replies, dropping down to her level.

"Oh…like…when Daddy thought I was mad at him?" Aria asks, "it hurt him right?"

"Yes," Leo replies.

I can't help but want to hug him.

"Will a hug make you feel better?" she asks.

He smiles and nods.

Leo took Aria to play with the other kids, I've started writing. Leo's still scared, but he's trusting me.

_4/9/789_

_Mikey and Donnie,_

_First time I've had time to write you both. Leo and I are together, but we're not coming home. Too much has happened to change things. We've seen and endured too much. Life isn't the same anymore. We're family again but we've chosen to stay where we are. We love you both and want you to know that we want to come home, we just can't. Not yet, maybe in a few years...but now we just want you both to know we're alive. I have a daughter and Leo is married with a son. Our stories are complicated and painful that much I'll tell you. We debated on whether or not to contact you and chose to in the end. _

_We love you guys and maybe in time we'll see each other again. For now remember that we are always brothers._

_-Raphael_

I touch the page and then gently slip it into the envelope Joban gives me. He doesn't understand why we don't want them to respond but he's accepting it.

I hope that at least that letter will ease their pain some.

Until then I have to try and comfort Leo and help him find his strength again. The strength to go home.

"Raphael, don't forget your surgery is scheduled for tomorrow night as long as the weather eases up," he tells me.

I can't wait.

_

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_

**Reviews are wanted!**


	18. Chapter 18: Surgery

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs" you know the drill.**

**The Next Chapter and Only Chapter where this will happen will be in Don's POV. I want you guys to get the reaction to the Letter. **

**Also this will be a short Chapter.**

**Chapter 18: Surgery**

My surgery got postponed a few more days. I am as scared as I am excited. I so badly want to talk to my daughter. To tell her everything I've ever wanted her to know. But I'm worried about something going wrong. Leo's promised me that he'll take care of Aria, but still.

"Relax," Leo comforts.

Joban let him come with me. I glance his way and lock eyes with him. It's been almost two months since he and Nel were reunited and with that unity, came my brother's spirit. He's more himself now than he was before he knew she was alive. He's himself again, the strong willed and sometimes aggravating older brother that I remember. They truly became one yesterday. I honestly can say I'm proud of him, he fought through the fear and gave Nel the chance to truly be his.

"What?" Leo asks.

I blink and realize I've be staring at him. I chuckle and shake my head.

I see him raise an eye ridge before shaking his head at me. I notice how tense he is and then touch his arm.

Lately I've learned more about Leo's first year as a slave. He spent time in isolation rooms, torture chambers, and the like. He was beaten, verbally abused, tortured, and finally…the thing that broke him, he was raped. That was the first time, but not the last.

"I'm fine," he murmurs, but I feel him shift closer to me.

I pull him into a hug and then let go as he relaxes.

"Thanks," he murmurs.

I nod and squeeze his hand, before letting it drop.

I can't help but wonder what he's afraid that our father will find him. I've decided that our father will _never_ be allowed to touch him. The other night, after I sent the letter. Leo was awake when I came to bed. I looked at him and realized how scared he was.

_**FLASHBACK*_

_**Did he ever hit you Leo?**_

_I hand the note to him, afraid to hear his answer._

"_No," he tells me, "he didn't Raph."_

_**He hurt you though?**_

"…_No," he replies. But the way his voice shook tells me he's lying._

_I push the note into his hand again. He drops his head and then looks at me with tears rolling down his cheeks._

"_When I failed…when I messed up he was so angry…he never hit me Raph…just the disappointment was enough," he whispers. _

_He's still lying. Protecting our father? _

_**Don't lie to me.**_

_I see the tears on his cheeks and he sobs._

"_He's our father and the leader of our clan…" he whispers._

_I'm furious. I get up onto the bunk beside him and make him look at me._

_**Tell me now Leonardo.**_

"_He'd slap me, that's it," Leo says, but he won't look at me still._

_I feel sick. Our father hit Leo? How often did my brother suffer under our father's anger? How often was it my fault?_

"_He just slapped me, that's it I swear Raph," he whispers, I see the pain in his eyes and ache to ease the hurt there._

_**END FLASHBACK**_

Even now I'm furious over it. Leo didn't deserve that. He struggled to keep us in line, to protect us and our father punished him when _we_ messed up. Now, after all Leo's been through, one slap could send him into hysterics.

"Joban?" I hear. I glance up as Joban walks by. I grip Leo's hand a moment and then get up at Joban's wave.

He puts a hand on my shoulder and squeezes it.

"See you in a few hours," he tells me.

I glance at Leo and give him a smile.

Minutes later I lay down on a gurney and fall asleep as the sedative drips into the IV on my arm.

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**Four Reviews are required for tomorrow's chapter to be posted. **


	19. Chapter 19: Long Awaited Contact

**Disclaimer: NOPE…well except the OCs and the Plot**

**Reminder: This Chapter is in Don's POV.**

**Chapter 19: Long Awaited Contact**

Nearly nine years since Leo left to find Raph. Master Splinter told us that he swore he wouldn't come back unless he had Raph with him. We found out last year, Leo never made that oath willingly. Master Splinter _forbade_ him from coming home unless he brought Raph back.

I found Leo's journal a few weeks after that and learned how heavy a burden Leo had been carrying. I found out what happened to him when we messed up, got hurt, or if he failed a mission. Leo got hit, _slapped_ repeatedly and then sent to train until he couldn't stand, there were nights where Leo never slept because Master Splinter made him train.

Splinter's reasoning?

_A leader must be as close to perfection as possible and must not allow his team to become injured or lost._

And we teased him about being perfect, he didn't want to be, he wanted to be himself. Leo just wanted to have the connection that Mikey, Raph, and I had. He felt cut off from us, alone. To my horror I found out Leo considered suicide three times, but stopped because one of us came home, walked into the lair or came into the dojo. He was desperate for our support, and we just teased him.

Master Splinter declared both of my older brothers dead last year, not long before I found out what he did to Leo. What we did to him.

My biggest fear?

That Leo killed himself when he couldn't find Raph. Rather than never be allowed to come home.

I haven't told Mikey about Leo's journal or about what Master Splinter did. He's distraught as it is, he doesn't need to know that the person he goes to for comfort drove Leo away.

I jump as my phone goes off and then look at it, it's April.

We don't talk to April or Casey much anymore, it's too hard, they always want to know if we've heard anything…when Master Splinter declared my brothers dead. I called to tell her, cried my heart out, vented my anger that our father was giving up. Never told her what I found out later.

"Hello?" I ask softly.

_Don…I was wondering if you and Mikey could come up and help me with something._

"April…I," I start.

_It's important, hurry Don._

"But-" I start, she hung up.

With a sigh I get up and go to find Mikey.

"Mike," I call.

He looks up from the TV, he just sits there, he doesn't even watch anymore. I haven't seen him play a video game since before Raph vanished.

"Come on, April needs help with something," I sigh.

"What does she need?" he asks.

I shrug and then head toward Master Splinter's room, I'm now the head of the clan, but I still have to tell our father where we go.

After I walk in I spot him sitting in the meditation position.

Old habits die hard, I kneel and then wait.

"Hai Donatello," he rasps.

He's getting really old, and age is catching up to him. Every movement seems to be painful for him. Part of me is glad he's hurting, the part of me that angry about what he told Leo, but the other part worries about him, the part of me that is a dutiful son.

"April needs help with something," I reply.

I still respect him as my father, still love him as a father, but I'll never forgive him for what he did to Leo.

"Very well my son, I trust you," he rasps out.

You never trusted Leo. Yet you trust me.

I bow and then leave waiting for Mikey to come with me.

I drop onto the fire escape and tap the window lightly.

April rushes over and opens it.

"Hey, it's good to see you guys," she says, hugging me.

"What did you need?" I sigh.

She gives me a sad look and then walks over to the counter and picks up an envelope. My heart stops. Could it be after all this time?

"Don…it's only marked for you and Mikey," she says softly.

I take the letter and clutch it.

Mikey walks up beside me and touches the letter.

Slowly we open the letter together and I start reading aloud.

"_Mikey and Donnie,_

_First time I've had time to write you both. Leo and I are together, but we're not coming home. Too much has happened to change things. We've seen and endured too much. Life isn't the same anymore. We're family again but we've chosen to stay where we are. We love you both and want you to know that we want to come home, we just can't. Not yet, maybe in a few years...but now we just want you both to know we're alive. I have a daughter and Leo is married with a son. Our stories are complicated and painful that much I'll tell you. We debated on whether or not to contact you and chose to in the end. _

_We love you guys and maybe in time we'll see each other again. For now remember that we are always brothers. Raphael" _I finish.

I let the papers drop to the ground and fight tears.

"They're not coming home?" Mikey sobs.

I shake my head and sob.

"Leo found a way to escape," I manage.

"What?" April asks.

I tell them then, what I've know for almost a year. April is shocked, Mikey…he just seems to crumple. He's sobbing now, grieving in a whole new way.

How could they do this to us? It was better thinking they were dead, rather than knowing they are alive but aren't coming home.

Leo please…you and Raph need to come home. We need you both back.

That night instead of telling Master Splinter they are alive, Mikey and I pack our things.

It's time to unite our family again.

April will tell Master Splinter tomorrow, have him read the letter that wasn't addressed to him.

I pause at the lair door and wait for Mikey to come.

He jogs up and stops beside me.

"I…I-I had to tell him Don. I told him they're alive and that we're going to go find them. Nothing else," he whispers.

I place a hand on his shoulder and grip it.

"Are you ok?" I ask him.

"When we find them I will be," he whispers.

With that he turns and walks out the door of the lair.

I glance back and see Master Splinter, shuffling toward me.

"Donatello," he rasps, "Please…give these to your brothers."

He hands me two letters, on them are the names of my brothers. One for Leo and one for Raph.

"If Leonardo is willing to forgive me and come home he is welcome, no matter what. Raphael, tell him I want a whole family again," he rasps.

I bow.

"Thank-you Sensei," I murmur.

For the first time in almost a year I realize how much I've hurt him. He regrets everything that he forced Leo to bear, and wants him to come home.

"I'll bring them home," I say softly.

"Thank-you my son," he murmurs.

I turn and leave, how we're going to find them is one thing and how we are going to get there is another. April said the letter wasn't from an Earth. But we'll find them and bring them home.

I swear it.

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Reviews are requested.


	20. Chapter 20: Awakening

**Disclaimer:**** only the OCs and Plot**

**Back to Raphael's POV from here on.**

**Sorry for the sort chap. Very long one tomorrow.**

**Chapter 20: Awakening**

I groan as I come to. I start to move my head and find my attempt stilled.

"Easy," I hear Leo murmur.

He comes into view, everything is blurry and my stomach reels. I feel sick.

"Shhh," he says.

My throat feels raw.

"Don't try to speak yet, they said you need to wait a few days. Squeeze my hand once if you understand," he tells me.

I squeeze so hard he yelps.

"I'll take that as a yes," he laughs, shaking his hand.

I grin at him.

…

Two days later I'm sitting in Joban's study and the neck brace has just been taken off. I swallow a few times and then nervously touch my throat.

Joban looks at the doctor beside him.

"Is he ok to try?" Joban asks.

"He can try, nothing over a whisper though at least for a while," the doctor replies.

I clear my throat and then try to speak, nothing comes out. My heart drops.

Leo touches my arm as I grip the chair and shake my head.

"Leo…don't-," I freeze…it's there…my voice.

Leo freezes and then slowly grins.

"Raph…you just," he says.

"I know," I whisper, a smile forming on my lips, "Where's Aria?"

"Outside," he replies.

I look sprint out of the room with their laughter following me. Too excited to care.

"DON'T SHOUT!" The doctor calls.

I won't, I don't want to risk losing this gift.

I find Aria outside with the other kids and pick her up.

"Daddy?" she asks.

"Hi baby," I whisper.

Her eyes get big and then she touches my throat.

"Daddy," she gasps.

"Yeah," I say softly.

I've never been so happy. I hug her and tell her I love her.

* * *

**Reviews Please.**


	21. Chapter 21: Midwinter Festival

**Disclaimer:**** no…not the cannon characters**

**Chapter 21: Midwinter Festival**

Winter is harsh on top of this planet, Kalgon, I now know it's called. I know why it got so cold underground now, it's freezing now.

Leo and I are over 300 thousand light years from home, from our family. Leo told me the other day that he never hated our father for what he did. Leo still loves him as a son loves his father, still craves our father's praise, aches for the long talks they used to have. Despite the burden of perfection my brother carried, Master Splinter always gave him support, even as he punished him.

Leo said after he completed the training and everything Splinter subjugated him to, Splinter would hold him close and tell him that he loved him, that he was proud. Now Leo says that that pride would vanish. Leo's happy here, happy to have people who look to him, not because they have to, but because they want to.

I'm staring out the window at the twin moons here, looking strangely enough at the constellation that marks my home.

Sol, the yellow star of Earth, home.

"Raph?" I hear Leo ask.

"Yeah?" I reply.

Getting my voice back was like having water after being in a desert for years.

"What'cha looking at?" he asks.

"Hohk, Guk, and Sol," I reply, the moons and my home.

"You miss home don't you?" he whispers as he leans against the window next to me.

He still fears that I'll leave him alone. He has Nel and Gaeh, but losing a brother will break his heart. He already thinks two want nothing to do with him, if I were to leave, I honestly think he'd die of sorrow.

"Leo we've been through this…I'm not going back without you," I say firmly, giving him a half hearted glare.

I see the corners of his mouth twitch upward a little.

"I...I-I know…it's just-" he starts.

"Oh shut-up ya' worry wart," I mutter, lightly cuffing his head.

He chuckles and looks out the window with me. He's fidgety, he can't work the horses lately because it's too cold and we can't train because it's too cramped in here. Everyone's inside trying to escape the cold. Our breath frosts the window a little and out of some random giddiness I draw a smiling face in the frost.

I see Leo raise an eye ridge and then draw his own...I grin and draw a tongue sticking out of mine's mouth.

Leo laughs and shakes his head.

"Brat," he mutters.

I chuckle.

"What are you getting Aria for Christmas?" he asks.

I pause, suddenly aware of the impending date and the knowledge that I have nothing to give anyone in my family. Midwinter Festival is the same here as Christmas back home, only there's dancing and more games.

"I…don't know," it ends a whisper and I rub the bridge of my nose, suddenly embarrassed.

"Joban's giving us each an allowance to get stuff for our family members, want to go into town with me tomorrow? Nel's making me go anyway," he mutters.

It's all I can do not to laugh at his annoyance. He loves Nel, but being dragged along with the women to go shopping is definitely _not_ his thing. I snort instead and shake my head.

"Yeah who's going to keep you sane otherwise?" I tease.

He glares at me, but I see the humor in his eyes.

"Yeah," he whispers, then I see the nervous fear in his posture and I flinch realizing out close I really was to being right.

He's still touchy and nervous around people he doesn't know well. Get him backed into a corner and he starts panicking. The other jockey's figured that out the hard way. Jockey's are racing horses' riders, they have to be light, strong, and quick thinkers. Leo fit's the bill perfectly, even after all the training he's been doing he's still skinny as hell and it not because he isn't eating. I practically shoved a whole plate down his throat the other night after hearing that he was bingeing. He wasn't, just a rumor because he hasn't gained a pound over 180 since he bulked up some.

Me?

I weight over 260, all muscle though. I'm still solid muscle, though not as huge as I was before coming here. Training has helped me trim down and get more agile again. But years of conditioning isn't going to get rid of my shoulders and arms easy. I like it though, reminds me of how much I lift or how bad I can mess someone up if they mess with my family.

Leo said I was muscular even before I was a slave, he said I always looked like a football player. Took me a while to remember what they looked like.

"Raph? Hello?" Leo's voice breaks into my thoughts.

I blink and then look at him in surprise.

"What?" I ask.

"You never replied to my question," he says.

"What one?" I ask.

"What do you want for Christmas from me?" he laughs.

"Oh…um I really don't know Leo…I," I start, shrugging as I trail off.

"Hmmm," he says softly.

I roll my eyes at him and sigh, watching our drawings vanish under a fresh wave of frost.

"Daddy?" I hear Aria ask, I turn and glance down at her. She's in her night dress, hugging a doll Yelgeh made for her.

I scoop her up and hug her to me, leaning against the window.

"What's wrong baby?" I ask softly.

She yawns and rubs her eyes. I know then she wants me to come lay down so she can go to sleep next to me. Something Yelgeh's told me I need to break her from. I move her hair out of her face and carry her toward the bunks that Leo and I have realigned so that Yelgeh and the kids are up against the wall, with me, Leo and Nel in the bunks on top. Not that Aria ever stays curled up on the lower bunk with Gaeh though, she climbs up and snuggles with me all night.

Leo follows me scooping Gaeh's sleeping form from Nel's arms and kissing her as he takes him. Nel will come to bed later when she's done talking, as will Yelgeh.

Aria is asleep before I get to the bunks. Head resting against my shoulder her auburn-umber tresses falling over my arm. I smile as I lay her down gently and sit down beside her as I cover her up and then kiss her softly.

"Love ya' baby," I whisper as I get up so Leo can put Gaeh down on the pillow opposite. Gaeh snuggles up and closes his eyes as Leo repeats what I did.

My family here is close, closer Leo said than any of us were back home.

On our way back to the rest of the group Leo asks me something that throws me off.

"Have you ever thought of finding someone?" he asks.

I look at him like he's lost his mind.

"After my experience with women you honestly asked me that?" I ask.

He laughs, _laughs_.

"Raph, Tasehle didn't really qualify as a wife you know," he chuckles

I stop walking when he says that.

"What about Aria? How do I explain bringing a woman into her life that isn't her mother?" I say as he turns to me.

"She's smarter than you think bro. She'd understand that you'd want someone special. Raph she wants a mother, just chose wisely," he replies.

I can't move.

"Since when did you become a dating expert?" I gasp finally.

He chuckles and pats my carapace, before walking over to sit beside Nel. I swear he's lost his mind.

There is no wa-_whoa_.

Despite my will I watch Fuira walk by in shock. Realizing it's been months since I saw her last and if possible she's gotten more beautiful.

Her red hair is down, the scarlet curls falling in waves and seeming to wrap around her. The short golden dress she's wearing shows off her legs quite well, toned and lightly muscled, covered in tight leggings that are creamy white. The boots she's wearing showing how small her feet are. As my eyes travel upward I notice the way the golden dress hugs the curves of her waist and chest. Teripan women might not have breasts but their plastron's curve to suggest it all the same. She's wearing a white jacket over it, focusing my eyes inward.

I shake my head.

NO!

I will _not_ succumb to her…not-oh hell…I give up, I'm going to bed. I turn around and head to my bunk shaking my head and muttering.

I swear I'm going to go insane if she goes shopping with everyone else tomorrow.

…

She came…I swear they planned this…Leo, Nel, and Yelgeh. I'll kill them.

"Raph?" Leo asks.

I sigh and look at him.

"What?" I snap.

He snorts and hold up the toy in his hand. It's a stuffed teddy bear.

"Do you think Gaeh-?" he asks.

He's been trying to decide what to get his son for the past hour. I've already grabbed a doll that I have a feeling Aria will freak over, complete with various little outfits and I got her a new comb since the one I got her so long ago is shot.

I look at the toy bear and nod.

"Yeah Leo he'll like that, I've caught him cuddling Aria's doll some nights," I reply softly.

Leo puts it into the cart we're using. Shaking his head and muttering something about boys not playing with dolls. I can't help but laugh a little at that.

It isn't until later that I think of what I want to get Leo. There's a shop for it around here somewhere. It costs me an arm and leg to get them but I'm sure Leo will love them, besides he doesn't look right without them on.

….

~ Christmas Morning ~

"DADDY!" Aria shrieks, landing on me to which I grunt and sit up quickly.

"WHAT?" I gasp out.

"Santa came!" she squeaks, pointing down to the base of our bunk.

I chuckle and nod for her to go see.

Leo and Nel are being roused by Gaeh's excited squeals.

Yelgeh is already sitting up, smiling as the kids beg us to hurry.

I climb down and sit beside Yelgeh as Leo and Nel join me.

The kids quickly pile up the presents beside us and then watch us anxiously to have permission to open theirs.

I smile at Aria who keeps looking at the three presents at her side excitedly.

"Go ahead Gaeh," Leo says softly.

He's youngest so he gets to go first, fair enough.

Gaeh opens his presents and his eyes get huge at the toy bear Leo got him, before slowly opening the other two, never putting the bear down. I got him toy car that I saw him watching one of the other kids here playing with earlier this winter. Yelgeh made him a quilt. All different shades of blue, with a light blue backing. His chosen color. Leo pulls out another present then and hands it to Gaeh.

It's a ninja mask, light blue. Gaeh gasps and holds still as my brother ties it in place. Father and son matching. Leo's is darker blue though.

Aria looks at me expectantly and I nod. She opens my gifts first and squeals in delight, hugging the doll and touching the various clothes with glee. I feel happier than ever before, pleased that my gifts please her so much. Leo and Nel's gift is next, Nel must've picked it out. It's a teripan girl's traditional Fajv dress. Simple cut with beautiful patterns, red and gold are the main colors. Yelgeh made her a quilt too, this one is various shades of red, rust-red as the backing.

Like Leo I have one more gift. Her eyes get big as I hold out the rust-red mask and comes quickly over so I can put it on her, smoothing her hair so it lays flat under the cloth.

"Thanks daddy," she whispers, hugging me.

"You're welcome baby," I reply.

Leo and Nel exchange their gifts. Leo gets a new jacket, deep blue, with black sleeves. He puts it on and smiles. Nel gets a brightly toned Fajv with yellow and pale blue colors swirled with white. I watch as she touches the fabric in awe. They open our gifts next. Nel gets a small yellow quilt from Yelgeh to which Leo and I both look at in confusion. Nel and Yelgeh just grin. She gasps when she opens mine. I got her a book in the Teripan language. She looks at me in shock.

"How?" she breathes.

"Leo told me," I mumble.

"Thank-you," she whispers, "It's beautiful."

When Leo gets to his, the long skinny package from me he hesitates before opening it. As he opens the lid of the case I see a tear roll down his cheek.

"Raph…I-I…I can't…their beautiful," he whispers, pulling out one of the slender Katana and cradling it, fingers touching the blue and black woven hilt.

He stands up with it and practices a few strokes, smiling as the blade moves smoothly.

"Their perfect Raph," he murmurs, smiling at me.

I'm glad. You look yourself with them bro.

I smile back and chuckle.

"Ya' welcome bro," I reply softly.

Yelgeh opens her's next laughing when she sees the bag full of yarn and cloth Leo, Nel, and I got her.

I'm last and not because I'm eldest simply because I want to be last.

I got a new jacket too, it's my crimson tone with black sleeves like Leo's, Nel's gift. Yelgeh got me a small sewing kit and a book in English, and I can't believe what it is. _Lord of the Rings _all four stories compacted, how a copy of this series got way out here I'll never know, but I love it anyway.

Leo's gift is last. As I open the case I feel tears roll down my cheeks. Sitting inside are two, gleaming Sai, the hilts wrapped in crimson and black.

I stand and practice a few moves, reveling in the way the weapons feel in my hands after so long, feeling _right_.

…

It's later at dinner that I catch Fuira walking away from my bunk and find a slim book on my bed. _The Last of the Mohicans. _I remember mentioning to Nel I liked it, she must've told Fuira.

Little does she know yet that I've left her a gift as well.

I small silver bracelet I caught her eyeing yesterday.

This is the best Christmas _ever_.

* * *

Reviews are much appreciated!


	22. Chapter 22: Spring

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs"**

****If you want me to post a chapter dedicated to the Teripan tongue after the story is over I'll give you guys some common words and phrases. Vote in reviews please. ****

**Chapter 22: Spring**

The winter is finally drawing to a close, we start planting the fields tomorrow and the horses get their first real work out in a long time. Leo is…laughably excited about finally getting to ride Wyndr at a full gallop again, let alone finally get to ride him in a race.

I'm out in the fields, helping the others plant for the year, we have to get the seeds down before the heavy spring rains. If the plants get a chance to root they'll make it and shoot up quick. If we don't get them in fast enough, they'll drown and be washed away and we'll have to wait a few weeks into summer to get them in and then half the growing season is gone.

"DADDY!" Aria calls.

I stop the gelding I'm using to plow and look up. The others behind me stop. We're in a line, hover-plow that is pulled by a horse, those that are dropping seeds, the ones that are covering the seeds, and those with the watering cans for the seeds.

Aria is running up to me carrying a water jug, there's more water on her than in the jug I think. Other kids are bringing water up to the others.

I pull the gelding to a stop and take the jug from her hands. Kissing her on the head as I do.

"Hey sweetie," I say softly before taking a drink of the water, realizing then how thirsty I am.

"Uncle Leo wants you to come to the track when you're done," she says.

I nod taking advantage of the momentary rest, I'm already stiff and sore from walking at an angle behind the plow and fighting to keep the blade in the dirt. The others are stretching and arching their backs to relieve the tension there. I glance around, and we still have over halfway to go in this field. The other fields are almost done, Joban only has three tractors so the rest of us have to do this the old fashion way. There are eight small fields and three big ones, those get the tractors. I'm in a smaller field, hence the plow.

"_Dad_ I was telling you something," Aria sighs.

I chuckle and reach down to touch her bandanna. She wears it all the time, like Leo, Gaeh, and I do.

I actually had to take it from her before sending her to take a shower the other night, she barely takes the thing off.

"What is baby?" I ask gently.

"Joban says there's someone hear to see you when you're done," she replies.

"Some one here to see me?" I ask.

"Yeah he said he knew you from a long time ago," she says.

I'm nervous instantly…what if its Splinter? My mouth feels very dry all the sudden and I shift my feet before taking a drink and handing the jug back to Aria.

"Thanks sweetie, I'll be sure to head in in a bit," I whisper.

"Daddy?" she asks, I see her confusion and manage to smile to hide my fear.

"Nothing sweetie, go back and play," I tell her.

…

It's dark when I finally head in for the night. Leo is with me, eyes flicking toward the house and then me. I can smell the fear coming off him.

He's terrified.

Joban greets us at the door of his study.

"Well you two took you long enough," he laughs.

I flinch a little and feel Leo shrink against me.

"Sorry sir I figured you'd want me to finish that back field," I lie.

Leo is quaking, he's moments from panicking.

I grip his forearm and he calms a little.

I sign into his wrist. _I'm here_

He stops shaking so bad, but I can still feel him trembling.

"Toa goay kalbe negeth hople ouha," Leo whispers. (_You said they'd never find us_)

The teripan tongue, we've both started speaking it a lot. Being immersed in the culture it was bound to happen. After all Nel and Yelgeh are natives, they were taken from Hojefka, the Teripan home-world, as kids. Why shouldn't we learn their language? It's ours now too.

"Hu negeth kojon kal werbe," I reply. (_I never thought they would_)

"Hu reoj tulgeh toa," he whispers. (_I still trust you_)

"Hu'ka reoj heba, Hu'le poagh toa," I whisper as we walk into the room. (_I'm still here, I'll still protect you_)

"Tajikle osa nou weruth?" he says softly. (_take-care of my family?_)

"Osa owen hahgern," I reply, looking him in the eye as I promise him. (_of course brother)_

We step into the study together, Joban is oblivious to our conversation, he's talking to us but we aren't listening.

I look up and lock eyes with someone I haven't seen in nearly ten years. _Michaelangelo._

"RAPHIE! LEO!" he shrieks, leaping from the chair and nearly bowling us over.

Leo freaks and ends up on the other side of the room in half a second. I swear he just had a heart attack.

I'm currently being immobilized by Mike's crushing hug. I _can't_ breathe.

"Mike. Let. Me. Go." I growl, managing to pull lose some.

Mike steps back as I push past him to Leo, whose hyperventilating in the corner.

"Leh'ya," I say. (Leo) its how you would pronounce it in the Teripan tongue. Mine is said _Rah or Rah'yal _in full_. _Leo's full name is said _Leh'yadar_.

Took us both a while to adjust to hearing the different pronunciations.

"Raph?" I hear Mike say softly, "Leo? What's wrong?"

"Leh'ya tulgeh loque," I ask walking over and holding out my hand. (_Leo trust me)_

He comes out after a bit and nervously inches over to me.

"Guys?" Mike whispers.

"Shut-up a minute Mike, you just frickin' gave him a heart attack," I snap.

Mike flinches and steps back I as make Leo look at me and finally get him to calm down.

"Mikey?" Leo whispers, finally calm enough to formulate thoughts.

"Leo? I…I'm sorry I just…it's been so long…I was just excited to-" Mike sobs.

Leo walks over and nervously pulls Mike into a hug.

I get a good look at him then. He looks tired, well worn out and thinner than I remember.

"How did you find us?" I ask.

"Don he…he figured it out before," Mikey says.

"Before what?" Leo and I ask together.

"It…got him," Mikey finishes.

* * *

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	23. Chapter 23: Searching

**Disclaimer: "Sighs" you know the drill…**

***images of the Lar'gih will be up on my deviantart page soon! As well as other artwork when it is completed. See my profile.***

**Chapter 23: Searching**

I freeze and feel sick. Don's in trouble? Leo looks at me in shock.

"It sounds like it's a Lar'gih from what he told me," Joban says softly.

I stagger back and reach for the wall. Lar'gih are…big, wolf-like dragons. They're hard to describe any other way. Their huge feet are scaled claws and they have almost a mane an tail like a horse. That's about all I can manage to do to describe them. They're vicious things. Some wander the woods around here and we have to keep watch around dusk. Joban's told us that the Lar'gih can get as big as a stallion. Six to eight hands high.

"When?" I gasp.

Mike presses his face into Leo's chest and sobs.

"I…I'm not sure…the last big storm…we got lost in it," he sobs.

That was three weeks ago, the possibility of finding Don _alive_ is slim to none. Leo tightens his grip around Mike and hugs him, fighting his own fear to comfort his brother.

"Leh'ya? Wohk ver avn quenn?" I ask softly. (_Leo? What do we do?_)

Leo looks at me and closes his eyes a moment, when he opens them he looks fierce as the warrior from our youth.

"Avn hople fom," he replies. (_We find him_).

Ten minutes later Leo and I are saying goodbye as we slip out into the dusk and begin running toward the barn.

We grab three horses. Two for us and one for Don if…_when_ we find him.

Leo knocked out Mike so he'd stay back and rest. Leo grabs Wyndr and swings up. I grab one of the few geldings on the place. He might be old but he still has some good legs on him. The other horse is smaller, but strong enough to hold our weight and fast enough to keep up with the other two.

Nel meets us at the barn door.

"Be careful," she begs Leo.

"I'll bring him back Nel," I tell her, "Keep an eye on Aria for me."

"Two eyes," she promises.

We turn the horses toward the forest and hope we don't get cornered by the beast back there.

I look at Leo and he nods, dropping into the jockey's crouch and urging Wyndr forward. We follow charging after him in the direction that Mikey told us they came from.

We're in the woods in seconds the branches slapping us as we ride. I focus on the hilts of Leo's swords, gleaming in the moons' light and feel the hilts of my own Sai against my plastron.

We're coming Don, hold on _please_.

Then I hear _them_.

They're running behind us. There's two at least and the horses start running faster when they smell them.

The shrieks cause the horses to run all out and for the first time in a long time…I'm scared.

* * *

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	24. Chapter 24:Blood

**Disclaimer:**** "nope"**

**Chapter 24: Blood**

The shrieks of the Lar'gih send chills down my spine, one is running just behind me. Two seconds after I realized this, the third horse screams and its reins are ripped from my hand. I twist around to see one of the beasts attack and kill the horse.

Leo is urging Wyndr to slow down.

HAS HE LOST HIS MIND?

I speed up and get to Leo.

"KOMR TOUH POA FALHKE??" I shout (_what are you doing?)_

"Jauwkel," he replies as I get close enough to hear him. _(waiting)_

"YOU. ARE. INSANE," I shout at him as we bend lower over the horses and let them run.

He laughs.

"Fohuj jopa kunv u hund bao," he replies. (_forgot how fun a fight was)_

It's official, he's lost his mind or my brother is completely back. Which ever it is, he's still crazy.

The other Lar'gih is right behind us, but somehow, we lose it back in the woods. Daylight breaks and we stop, realizing the Lar'gih is gone. Leo's chest is heaving as bad as mine, the horses are shaking they're so tired.

We look at each other and smile before bursting out into hysterical laughter.

We've both lost our minds.

"Where do you want to do? We've lost the trail," Leo sighs after catching his breath.

He's worried sick about Don, as bad as I am.

"We head back…try to find it…we're still heading the right way," I sigh, "come on bro we'll find him."

"Ko, avn'le hople fom," Leo sighs (_Yes, we'll find him)_

"G'cal owen," I reply softly, beginning to look around the area. (_of course_)

…

Two days later we find Mike and Don's old camp. It's trashed and things are scattered everywhere. The Lar'gih have been here more than once.

"RAPH!" Leo calls.

I turn toward him and walk over quickly.

Leo's bent over, with his hand in the dirt.

Tracking.

"Well?" I hiss, crouching beside him.

"Look," he says.

I do…it's a foot print that is like our own. Don. But not far away is signs of struggle and drag marks.

We grab the horses and start to follow the drag marks and Lar'gih foot prints.

There's dried blood everywhere. Leo is ahead of me, walking low, hands following the drag marks.

Then we both freeze and the horses try to jerk away, I realize they've been trying to for the past two miles.

There's a Lar'gih, asleep, right in front of us.

Leo is staring past it, I follow his gaze and spot a trembling figure at the back of the cave. Just barely visible in the dark.

_Donatello._

Neither one of us move at first and then, Leo slowly starts to creep around it to Don. Letting Wyndr go with a quick signal to stay put I follow him and do the same to my horse, slowly pulling the medical kit from behind my saddle. Leo and I creep forward slowly, carefully moving around the beast.

I drop down next to Don and touch his throat. His breathing and pulse are irregular and weak. He sounds like he's breathing glass.

I look in over in horror, trying to figure out how he's even alive. His legs and plastron are bloody and torn up. There's blood on his throat, coming out of his mouth and nose.

Leo grabs the first aide kit from me and we start wrapping him up with the strips we have best we can.

When he's wrapped up enough to risk moving I slowly lift him into my arms and carefully begin to lift him up.

Don groans and I freeze as the beast behind us grunts and moves.

Leo unsheathes his swords and moves into a protective position.

"F'pu," Leo orders (_run)_

I grab Don and drag him close and then jump past the Lar'gih just in time. I hear rather than see Leo attack it. I secure Don to the saddle and then turn to face the beast.

Leo is moving faster than I thought he could, blades silver blurs. I join in and aim my Sai, throwing the first one it hits and sinks into the beast's forehead, just as Leo's katana slit's the throat. Blood pumps and sprays everywhere. Leo is covered in it and I catch him as he staggers back.

We look at each other and fight to catch our breath. After a few seconds, Don's moans remind us of what we have to do. I retrieve my Sai and Leo cleans his katana.

I check on Don and feel his fluttery pulse.

We need to get him back home as fast as possible.

"Iuku poklu," Leo orders, scrambling onto Wyndr. (_let's go)_

"Avn muthle wertaga," I gasp, getting up behind Don and steadying the trembling figure. (_we must hurry_)

"Yes," Leo says, turning Wyndr toward were we figured home must be.

Then I see it…the tear in Leo's shirt and the blood on his right side.

He's hurt.

* * *

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	25. Chapter 25: Rest

**Disclaimer:**** only the OCs and the Plot that surrounds them **

**Chapter 25: Rest**

We stopped for the night, Leo's bleeding really bad and we're both exhausted. Don's stable. Leo managed to get Don's injuries cleaned out and the worst stitched before he let me look at his side.

It wasn't as bad as I thought. I ripped up my blanket and used it as bandages for his side.

He's asleep now, curled in a heap with Don pulled close for warmth. I don't think he'd have let Don curl that close if one, Don wasn't hurt so bad, and two, he wasn't so tired.

I glance at them and sigh. My own body aches for sleep.

Exhaustion is dragging me under, but I have to stay awake for a little longer, then Leo will sit watch for a bit. I glance up at the stars and wonder if our father is even still alive. I sit back and sigh, force myself to watch my surroundings.

…

I must've dozed off because I'm wrapped up with Don now, Leo's sitting up, he's hunched over though, like its taking every effort he has to stay awake.

"Leo?" I ask, "Woln q'nk toa-?" (_when did you-?)_

"Shhhhh, tuthe koreng," he cuts off. (_just sleep)_

"Koen," I start, moving to get up. (_but)_

"Pu'den hahgern," he tells me. (_rest brother)_

Despite my will I find myself listening to him, I wake to hear someone whimpering. It's Don, he's shivering and in a great deal of pain. Leo is kneeling over us, trying to get Don to drink.

"Where-?" Don rasps, "who?"

"Shhh, toa muthe suque," Leo tells him. (_you must drink)_

I help Don sit up some and he coughs before managing to get it down. Don's confused I can tell by how tense he is despite his pain.

I lock eyes with Leo and he nods.

"Iuku poklu," he whispers as Don eases back against me. _(let's go)_

"Ko," I agree, "Toa pu'den?" (_yes-'have' you slept 'enough'?)_

"Ko," Leo replies firmly.

I hope he's telling the truth.

Don moans as I lift him. At first I'm annoyed, his injuries are bad yes, but nothing to what I've had over the past ten years. Then I remember, he hasn't been through that kind of pain before, so this is bad to him.

I ease him into the saddle and wrap the blanket around him.

"Who…are you?" Don coughs out.

"Duiaen," I whisper to him. _(Friends)_

"I…don't...understand," Don manages.

"Rest," I order softly.

"…Raphie…?" he gasps, trying to turn to me, but the effort is too much and he's exhausted and just sags against me. My voice no longer has the heavy Brooklyn accent it used to have, now, for one its deeper, and it has the Teripan tongue accent, its more subtle than the Brooklyn one though. It just changes how some of my words come out. For instance. "Rest" that I told Don might've sounded more like "reys'd" to him. I'm not sure…immune to the difference after hearing it so much I guess.

We make it back to the edge of the property two days later and Don is fading in and out. Shivering from what is left of the cold weather around us.

I barely remember carrying Don inside or even getting off my gelding for that matter.

I just remember curling into my bunk and feeling Aria snuggle next to me.

…

I wake to someone sitting in front of me. It's Mike. He smiles when I see him. What? How is he…why am I in the medical area?

"Easy bro," he says, getting up.

"Where's Leh'ya?" I get out.

He looks confused.

"Um-," he starts

"He means Leo," I here Fuira say, taking effort to say it how Mike would know it.

"Oh," Mike replies, stepping aside to let Fuira by.

I sit up slowly.

"You need to rest," she orders.

"Where-?" I gasp as my ribs give out a protest. OW! Oh my gosh…that hurts. I grimace and grab my ribs, falling back onto the pillows.

"You strained your ribs bringing Don'yelo in," she tells me.

Don'yelo? Oh Donatello.

"Leh'ya?" I grunt, rolling into a more comfortable position.

"Resting," she tells me, sitting down.

She touches my arm and kisses my forehead. If I wasn't so angry and tired right now I'd snap at her.

We're not exactly together yet, but we're definitely interested in each other now.

"Pu'den Luarah," she tells me. _(rest love)_

"Ko, nou buluaren," I reply, startled, but pleased. (_yes my beloved)_

She kisses me again before leaving. I think its safe to say we're together now.

"Um," Mike says after she leaves, "are you two…um…"

"Yeah," I sigh, "now help me up."

"Um…they said you had to-," he starts.

"Mi'k, shut-up and help me up," I growl, using the teripan pronunciation of his name.

As I start to get up my ribs scream against it and I nearly pass out. But I make it up and Mike helps me stay steady as I go looking for Leo.

He's curled up with Nel and Gaeh, sound asleep and looking relaxed.

I turn a little and spot Don wrapped in blankets and asleep as well.

"He woke up yesterday," Mike tells me, "You and Leo have been out cold for a week."

A WEEK?

I nearly fall over in shock.

Don stirs then, he opens his eyes and rest them on me.

"Raph?" he says, moving toward me and Mike, "It…was you"

I sigh and nod.

"Go back to sleep," I urge.

I just make it back to my bed and then curl into a heap with Aria who has come back in to snuggle with me.

I hear Mike say something about her before I'm out, but I don't catch what he said.

* * *

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	26. Chapter 26: Conversation

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs"….well you all know the drill…so I won't repeat it.**

**Leo: Ugggghmm?**

**Me: "gives him innocent look" What?**

**Raph: "walks up behind" Say it.**

**Me: EEEP…Um…I don't own them…just OCs and Plot. "hides behind Don"**

***Do you think that Don and Mikey should have a chance at love? Let me know in reviews!!!***

**Also: Would you be interested in seeing Leo's side of this story? Through his eyes? It would be titled **_**Chained Soul**_**.**

**Chapter 26: Conversation**

Just found out that Nel's pregnant, Leo's ecstatic. I swear he just flipped about eight times before he told me.

"Gaulurs," I laugh as he stops and grins at me. _(Congratulations)_

"I just…I don't know how…what to think Raph," he gasps, leaning against the railing next to me.

I chuckle and look at him.

"Toa kuar oen athe," I tell him. (_you will be a good father 'again')_

He smiles a little, then his smile, his joy, its gone and I see agony and fear take over.

I look over my shoulder and feel myself bristle with anger.

Its Don and Mike walking toward us.

How dare they? Leo has every right to be happy right now and not have to think about honor and sepukku. He doesn't need to think about not being able to see that child grow up, to see Gaeh grow up.

Before I realize it I stand up and walk over to them.

"Raph!" Leo hisses.

"Hey Raphie-!" Mike starts to greet.

I hit him, hard. He gasps and back away, clutching his face.

"Leave," I spit.

Don's looking at me in shock, as I turn I see the tears starting.

"Raphie?" I hear Mikey sob, "what did I do?"

I turn and head back to Leo.

I lock eyes with him and see the shocked look on his face, but the gratitude is there too.

"Why-?" he starts.

"I promised I'd protect you," I tell him, "go spend time with Nel and the baby."

He pauses, looks me in the eye.

"They're still our brothers," he whispers.

I know, but I'll never let them hurt you or let Splinter hurt you again. Never.

Leo turns to leave and I hear the sound of crying behind me, then someone touches my shoulder hesitantly.

"Raphie?" the voice shakes and I turn to look at him.

It's Don, he flinches a little as I turn around. His injuries are finally healing, his legs weren't as bad as Leo and I thought thankfully.

"What?" I snap, "what do you want with us?"

Tears start rolling down his cheeks.

"We…we want our family back," he says softly.

I suddenly realize how much I just hurt them.

"We aren't the same people," I tell him softly, turning to go to Mike.

I drop down and grip his chin and make him look at me.

He flinches as I lock eyes with him, I turn his head to look at his cheek.

"Can you move your jaw?" I ask him.

"Yeah," he whispers.

"Good, go see Yelgeh Weavinghands," I order, "then come find me."

"But," Mike starts.

I get up and push past Don, who tries to grab my arm, I jerk away. It hurts to hurt them like this, but they must understand, Leo and I are not the same people we once were.

…

I'm sitting down on the stairs, watching the kids play as I work the needle and thread through the seem of the jacket in my hands. It's not my new one that Nel got me, an old one that someone asked me to fix. All the other weavers are busy and I'm one of the few male weavers around here. I get a few gu for it…um like dollars back home. Enough to get a new needle and a new spool of thread.

I grip the needle between my teeth as I work the knot into staying put.

Someone sits beside me.

I grunt to let them know I know they are there.

"Raph…she told us that you two went through a lot but wouldn't tell us everything," Its Don.

I nod as I again push the needle through the leather.

"What did she tell you?" I ask softly.

"That…you were mute for five years and that Leo…he was a mess when you first found him," Don says softly.

"How's Mike's face?" I ask softly.

"Sore…but Yelgeh said he'd be fine," Don murmured.

"It's not my place to tell Leo's story," I tell him.

"I…I understand that," he tells me.

"I guess I'll tell you mine though…get Mike first…I'm not repeating it," I tell him.

"Ok…um…Raph…are you mad at me and Mike for coming after you?" Don asks.

"Not really…just worried…but you need Leo's story to understand that worry," I reply.

"When will he tell us?" Don asks.

"When he's ready…if ever…" I reply.

"Oh…" he murmurs, I hear him turn to leave.

As I hear them return I finish the last stitch and examine the patch, nodding as I see that everything is in order and the stitches are strong enough to last. I fold the jacket and set it beside me.

I pat the stairs beside me and then cast a glance toward the kids.

"K'so!!" I shout as I see the kids start playing rough. (_No!)_

They stop and look at me, some blush and shuffle their feet and a few boys start sassing me. I get up and head toward them and they bolt knowing I'll swat them for that kind of attitude. As I stop and wait, they come to me and apologize.

I wave them off and return to the porch. Sitting between my brothers.

"You two must understand that you are _always_ my brothers. But I will protect my family with my life," I say, looking them in the eye, "I'll kill to protect them."

They shift over.

"You…don't mean us when you say family do you?" Mikey whispers.

"Not…not in the same way," I reply.

I take a deep breath and start to tell them my story.

"Leo and I had a fight the night I disappeared. He wanted me to take the title as Head of Clan, I guess after I beat him…he thought I took his offer. He starved himself and didn't go home," I begin.

They give me this shocked look but don't say anything as I go on.

"I got hurt really bad…don't remember most of my own story. I ended up a slave…I was knocked out on the way to my old slave compound. I lived underground for the past eight and a half years." I sigh, shifting into a more comfortable position I tell them the rest of my story. Tell them about being in breeding stock, about Tashele, about losing my voice, and about Aria. I tell them everything except Leo's secret. That's his right to tell.

It's dark by the time I finish. The kids are coming in for the evening, to wash up before dinner.

I feel someone touch my carapace, I had removed my shirt to show them the scars.

"These scars came from hot-whips?" Don breathes.

I nod.

"Yeah," I sigh.

"Daddy!" Aria calls as she rushes up to me, showing me a bracelet she made. She's learning a lot from Yelgeh, the most recent of how to make the complicated woven bracelets that a lot of the women around here wear.

"I made it for you," she tells me, all smiles.

I chuckle and let her tie it in place. It's red and black threads. I pull her to me and kiss her forehead.

"Thanks baby, go get cleaned up for dinner all right?" I tell her.

"Ko, a'ae," she replies, pausing to glance at Don and Mike before scurrying off to get cleaned up. (_Yes, daddy)_

I eye the bracelet and shake my head. Well if she wants me to wear it I will. At least she wants me to.

"You…just-" Mike starts.

"Having a kid changes one's priorities Mike," I sigh.

Don laughs and shakes his head.

"You really are different," Don says.

I chuckle.

"Leo told me that when we first met up," I chuckle, getting to my feet and waving the remaining kids in, "he said he wasn't always sure it was me."

…

After dinner I get Aria to lay down for the night and then slip out with the other adults to talk. Don and Mike are toward the back of the room. I crouch next to Leo and Nel and give Nel a hug.

"Gaulurs," I tell her.

She smiles up at me and leans further into Leo. He relaxes when I take my seat beside him. I look across at Fuira and smile.

She is a tease I swear. She tosses her red hair behind her and gets up slowly, moving her hips seductively. She's going to drive me nuts.

I smile as she walks over and sits on my lap. Pushy dame.

I kiss her neck a little and pull her to me. She twists around so that we are facing each other and rests her head on my shoulder. I settle back against the wall like that. Relaxed and at ease.

Conversation starts back up around us and I lock eyes with Leo.

He's smirking…I'll pound him later, for now I'm just content to stay still.

* * *

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	27. Chapter 27: Secrets

**Disclaimer: Only the OCs and Plot. Cannon Characters are owned by Peter Larid and Kevin Eastmen.**

**Chapter 27: Secrets**

It's Sunday, the only day we tend to have off and it's pouring outside, the Spring Rains are here. It' been about two weeks since Don and Mike got here, and since Fuira and I became official.

Leo is spending more and more time with Nel and Gaeh. I think he's preparing himself to die. I won't let them force his hand. He's gained too much, too much to lose it all now.

I'm getting ready to train with Leo. My Sais are sheathed on my belt and I'm wearing only a lose pair of pants. Leo mimics me on the other side of the room.

It's the first time we're letting the kids join in. Aria is wearing a simple doji as Leo told me it's called and Gaeh is wearing one too.

I drop down and make sure Aria's belt is on right and that her hair is tied back out of the way. I've gotten pretty good with putting up hair and all that. Weaving skills come in handy, Aria wanted a braid today. Took me ten minutes to get it right, but she looks cute with it back like that.

I turn to check to see if Leo is ready to go and spot him adjusting Gaeh's doji. Something's wrong, he's all…then I see why.

Don is standing at the back of the room. Leo keeps giving him nervous looks. Where's Mike?

"Raphie?" I hear.

I glance up and see Mike.

"Hi!" Aria greets, cheerful as ever.

"Are you going to watch me too?" she asks, she's excited about getting to train with Leo and I.

Mike smiles.

"If…your dad says its ok," he replies, dropping into a crouch.

Aria looks at me.

"Please daddy?" she asks.

I flinch a little and look toward Leo. Leo is watching us nervously, I see him tense as Mike smiles and waves to Gaeh.

The look on Leo's face when Gaeh waves back and grins, nearly breaks my heart. I see him drop his face and finish getting Gaeh ready. I see the hurt tear and rolls down his cheek.

"Mike," I say softly, "you and Don are making Leo nervous."

Mike's blue eyes meet my own amber.

"Oh," he murmurs, looking at Leo sadly.

I smile at Aria who has turned her attention on Gaeh. Both are grinning and looking excited.

I get up and start to move forward with Aria.

"Why…do we upset him so much?" Mike asks.

"Ask him," I reply

"But…he avoids us. Every time we try to talk-," Mike starts.

"He's not ready to talk then Mike," I reply.

Mike's shoulders drop and he looks miserable.

I have Aria head out to start practicing, leaving Mike behind. I see Mike walk over and say something to Don before pulling him away.

It's not that I don't want anything to do with you two…I just won't risk you driving Leo to simply end his life rather than be forced to accept the knowledge that he must kill himself in front of his wife and child. Gaeh would be scarred for life.

Aria starts up the simple Kata Leo taught her last time. I step forward and start my own weaponless Kata. Gaeh and Leo stepping in beside us.

Twenty minutes later the kids are tired and ready to go play. Leo and I step aside to help them change before they can go and play.

"Leo," I sigh as we head back to do our own training.

He looks at me and then shifts nervously on the mat.

"Are…are you going to talk to them?" I ask softly.

"Why ruin what little respect they still have for me," he mumbles.

He looks so defeated, hopeless, like he knows nothing can ever be the same.

"Leo-," I start.

"I'm…sorry Raph…but I _can't_ lose them…" he whispers.

He doesn't have to elaborate for me, I know. He doesn't just mean Nel, Gaeh and the Baby, he means our brothers too.

"I spent ten years trying to get home…ten years trying to find you and be able to go home. Only to realize it can't happen…because if I do…Sepukku is the only result. My son, my wife, my brothers will have to watch me…take my own life…watch their father, Gaeh's grandfather…end me," Leo whispers, the tears are flowing freely and I can hear him fighting sobs, "Raph…to regain my family's honor…I have to die, but I'll never be there to see my child born, to watch Gaeh become the honorable man I know he will be. Would you want to let go of Aria…of Fuira…just to give them their honor back?"

The way he's looking at me, I know he's desperate to hold onto his family.

"No," I say after a second, "I…wouldn't. But….I couldn't hurt my younger brothers so much by never telling them why I cling so tightly to my family."

He looks me in the eye and then drops his head, submissive, fearful. All the old signs are back from before he healed.

"Leo?" I whisper, stepping forward to touch his arm, "what happened?"

"He…he said he'd Gaeh if I didn't-" Leo mumbles.

I freeze and then fight of the rage that begins to overwhelm me.

"Who?" I demand.

Leo won't look at me.

"Let's get our practice done," he mumbles.

I grab his arm and make him look at me.

"WHO?" I growl.

Leo starts shaking and whimpers some.

"Raph…you're scaring me," he sobs out.

I stop, realizing how upset he is, how much I've scared him.

"Leo?" I whisper.

"He used to be a foreman….back there…Joban brought him here two weeks ago…bought him as a slave," Leo whispers.

I feel sick. Leo's been hiding this from me?

"Why didn't you tell me?" I beg.

"You were happy with Fuira…and-" he breaks off.

I pull him into a tight hug and cradle him.

"You are my brother. Leo, I would've dropped anything I was doing to help you," I say gently.

"I…I know," he murmurs, but he won't make eye contact with me.

Someone comes running in and I look up.

"Svgar is here, he…Joban wants both of you immediately," the man tells us.

Leo tenses and looks at me nervously.

I squeeze his wrist and then urge him to follow.

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Reviews Please!!!!


	28. Chapter 28: Seperated Again

**Disclaimer:**** You all know the drill**

****Four One-Shots will be appearing soon.**

_**Fear-**_** scary movies, thunderstorm, Mikey gets scared.**

_**Lack of Sleep-**_** who ever knew Leo was so funny when he was tired?**

_**Glass-**_** Leo shows up wounded outside April's window. Exhausted and fading fast, can April save him?**

_**Christmas Special-**_** Ok. This is my contribution for Christmas, lots of fun here!**

**Chapter 28: Seperated Again**

My heart is frozen in my chest, Leo is staring at the ground at his feet, trembling all over.

Svgar just claimed that Don and Mike belong to him. Neither one of us can figure out how or why, we just know that Joban can't fight back on this issue. Don and Mike were on Svgar's land while they were trying to find us.

They…Svgar's taking them away tonight. Mike is staring at us in horror and Don looks more than scared, he looks terrified. Leo won't react at all, I think he's in shock.

Svgar is watching Don and Mike eagerly.

"You can't!" I gasp, "They're free men!"

"You insolent little-!" Svgar snarls, and moves toward me.

"Don't you dare touch my slave Svgar," Joban snarls, standing to his full height and glaring through those pale yellow eyes of his. Being half human and half Juorg gives him the height advantage over Svgar who is barely 5 foot.

I'm not exactly little either…I'm taller than Svgar by a whole foot.

Leo stands up and looks at Svgar.

"Take me instead," he says.

I freeze.

Don and Mike look at him, Mike starts shaking his head.

Joban gives him a shocked look. Heck I give him a shocked look.

"No," I finally get out.

Leo ignores me and walks up to Svgar.

"Take me instead," he whispers.

No…Nel, the baby, Gaeh….he can't…why can't I move????

Svgar is grinning smuggly.

"Well, well, well," Svgar chuckles, then to my horror he orders Leo to strip.

I see Leo flinch and I start to move forward. Joban looks at me, sorrow in his eyes, but the order is clear. Don't interfere.

Leo does what he says and waits. The scars on my brother's body are surveyed, the strength in his frame is taken into account. Svgar walks around him. I know how scared Leo is…how terrifying this is for him and yet…he's the brother from my youth right now. He's going to sacrifice himself to protect our brothers. I can't let him.

"Svgar…you know that-" Joban starts.

"He seems to be fine with the trade," Svgar snapped, "I'll take him, any children?"

"No," Joban says quickly.

I see Leo pale a little.

"Fair enough. Get dressed and grab your things now," Svgar orders.

I feel sick, I look at Joban desperately, pleading for him to do something, anything.

"Svgar, I'll be fighting to get him back," Joban growled.

"You won't get him back and you know it," he spits.

Leo pushes past me and I try to stop him.

"Leh'ya," I beg, he jerks away and heads out to get his things.

Don and Mike watch him go in shock, Mike walks over slowly.

"Leo?" Mike whimpers.

….

All I can do is watch in horror as Leo is cuffed and dragged into Svgar's hover car. He gave me a letter seconds ago, told me to give it to Don and Mike. It's his story.

Don gave Leo a letter, he said it was from Splinter.

I watch the hover car leave.

"DADDY!" I hear Gaeh scream.

I catch him and hold him tight. Gaeh fights me and tries to run after Leo.

"DADDY!" Gaeh screams, "DADDY DON'T LEAVE ME!"

I hug my nephew and sob, trying to calm the hysterical boy. He loves you Gaeh, he's trying to protect you.

Later that night I find Don and Mike sitting together, reading the letter that Leo gave them. Don looks up, I see the tears.

"He…he," Don starts.

"They really hurt him like that?" Mike whispers.

I nod.

"He…never quite got over everything," I murmur.

"We have to get him out of there," Don says.

I look at him sadly.

"If we get caught on Svgar's property we'll never be able to leave," I tell him, "I made Leo a promise I'd take care of his kids, of Nel. I have to think about my daughter too."

"You'd let him-" Mike starts, leaping to his feet and coming at me.

"I'm not letting him anything," I cut off, "We're going tonight, Don…you still good at cracking through security?"

Don nods.

"Let's go," I order.

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	29. Chapter 29: Time To Be A Team Again

**Disclaimer:**** Ok I don't own the cannon characters but I do own the OCs and the Plot.**

***Looking like four chapters left in this story guys. Hang in there. Oh haven't quite decided but there might be death. I have two ending scenarios in mind***

**Chapter 29: Time to Become a Team Again**

Aria, Nel, Gaeh, you are so lucky never to have to see this. I hope I get a chance to hold my daughter again though. Aria…I love you my little angel. I have my Sais shoved into my belt and Leo's swords across my back. I plan on giving them to him.

Eight years if hauling, almost two years of hard work around Joban's place and fifteen years of Ninjitsu training could never have prepared me for the horrors if Svgar's slave barracks, you can't even truly call them that. The slaves are crammed into uncomfortable bunks, they're thin and filthy.

Don managed to get us past the fence a half hour ago. We've been searching for Leo ever since, there is no sign of him anywhere. A slave stirs beside me as I creep forward, I act fast and hit a pressure point that will knock them out. He slumps limp and I keep moving.

"PSSST," I hear.

I turn and catch sight of a figure waving me over.

I move slowly, wary of a trap.

"You looking for the new guy?" he whispers.

I nod.

"He's in the main house, they locked him in isolation until Svgar decides what to do with him," he tells me.

"How do I know you aren't a snitch?" I hiss.

"I…you don't, but I swear if I can get anyone out of here…I want to," he murmurs.

I nod.

"Go west of the fence and you'll find a narrow gap, get through and run for it," I tell him, "hurry."

He gets up slowly and look around before hesitantly getting up and moving toward the door.

I creep around the other bunks and find Don and Mike, dragging them out.

Mike is gagging and trying to stay calm. Don looks like he's about to be sick.

I'm not doing much better.

…

We're inside the house now, treading carefully over the creaking floors. Don managed to disable the security and I took out the guard dogs. My arm still hurts a little from where one bit me.

The guards that are patrolling the area are carrying hot whips and heavy clubs. I'm doing my best to keep us out of sight. Mike and Don are both watching the guards nervously as they pass us.

I hold a finger to my lips and shiver nervously. Mike nods and Don slowly moves forward at my signal.

I hear laughter as we move slowly down the hall and sounds of something being hit. I turn slowly around the corner. I see a open doorway and just as I start to move forward I hear a muffled sob.

Leo.

I see him pulling away and move forward as quickly as I can.

"Don't" I hear Leo say, "don't touch me."

He's trying to be strong right now.

I round the corner of the doorway and growl. The guards look up in time to see me attack. Don and Mike follow me. I drag the first guard aside and reveal in the feeling of my fist connecting with his jaw.

"Don't. Touch. My. Brother." I spit.

He sags to the floor, utterly limp.

I turn to see Mike trying to coax Leo from the back corner. I see him move away and press himself all the tighter back there.

"Don't," he begs, "just leave me alone."

"Shhh Leo its me, it's Mikey," Mike coos, moving forward a little.

Don has debauched the other guard and is moving forward.

"Don," I hiss, "remember the letter."

He stops and flashes he a horrified look, realizing how close he just came to scaring Leo out of his mind.

"Leo," I coax, "Leh'ya, tulgeh loqu."

"Raph?" it's a whisper, frantic, hopeful.

"Yeah," I murmur, stepping forward to calm him.

"Its ok its us," Don says softly.

"Why are you here?" Leo begs.

"Its time to be a team again, a family again. Despite the scars and pain who are we without those that bind us by blood? Who are we without the kin and the comfort?" Don murmurs.

"We are nothing but an instant…snatched away quickly and forgotten," Leo finishes.

I can't help but smile. I pull Leo's swords off my carapace and toss them to Leo.

"Ya' ready Fearless?" I ask, remembering the old nickname I used to calm him by.

"Let the shadows…let the steel…the team be one," Leo says softly.

He comes out of the dark slowly, his swords clutched in his hands. In one fluid motion the sheath is on his back and he straightens up. I grin and Mike hugs him. For the first time in a long time I don't see Leo flinch. He looks us in the eye and then, slowly he smiles.

"You read…-?" he asks.

"Yeah, did you read Splinter's?" Don asked.

"No…I was afraid to…-" Leo starts.

"He-" Don starts to cut off.

Alarms blare around us.

"We gotta go now," I order.

Leo grabs Don and Mike and I follow.

We have to get out of here _now_.

* * *

Reviews are much welcomed and I do my best to reply to everyone!!


	30. Chapter 30: Decisions

**Disclaimer: "sighs" Um…I have yet to come into ownership of bipedal talking turtles other than, Nel, Gaeh, Yelgeh, Aria, and Fuira. But I do own the Plot!!!!**

**Chapter 30: Decisions**

We've nearly made it back to the fence. Leo is crouched down with us behind him. Even though he trusts us I see the tension in his shoulders. Too many bad memories make him wary.

Mike crouches down next to Leo and watches the other direction. Don is keeping an eye behind us and I'm craning my neck to make sure no one is coming from the left. Lights are flashing around us and a beacon is scanning the shadows near the fence.

Don gives a soft whistle and I turn quickly. Two guards are walking this way.

No…crap they'll see us.

Leo is watching them and then slowly he crawls sideways towards them, one hand on the ground and the other up to his swords. I catch on quick and start moving slowly.

Leo slips into a dark spot and I just spot him standing.

Don and Mike vanish into the shadows beside me and I step back.

The guards pass us and we slip out behind them. Leo nods for us to follow and we all move slowly along the wall.

I tap Don's shoulder and sign out _fence where?_ into his hand. Don moves to the front and Leo steps back.

It feels like years before we reach the broken area of the fence. There are guards around it and I see the man who told me where Leo was on the ground. He's dead.

I grieve for him, he deserved to walk out of here.

I scan the area, there are eight guards and four of us…two each. I glance at Leo.

He's pale and I see how nervous he is. Combat, something he hasn't been in since our youth. I touch his shoulder and he glances at me.

_Ready?_ I sign.

He nods.

I lock eyes with Don and then Mike.

"You with us?" I whisper.

"What are brothers for?" Mike teases.

"Until death takes me, I'll be by both your sides," Don replies.

I feel a tear fall and quickly wipe it away. I catch sight of the glistening tears on Leo's cheeks and the sad smile on his face.

"Let's give them hell," I manage.

Leo smiles at me and then, leaps forward, we follow him seconds later.

Roaring our rage and determined to get out.

Blurs of sliver block my view of Leo. Don is wielding his Bo like a man possessed. I just catch a glimpse of Mike dart from one spot to the next.

Then its over and I look around to find my brothers.

Leo is grinning, breathing hard and shaking some, but grinning.

Don and Mike high-three each other and grin at us.

Sounds of dogs barking makes me turn.

"RUN," I order.

Don and Mike make it through the fence, Leo pauses to wait for me, I dash through and drag Leo after me.

"RUN!" I order.

We dash for the safety of Joban's fence and land. I make it over the fence, as do Leo and Don.

Mike stumbles and I hear his scream.

I skid to a stop and see Leo fly past me.

A Lar'gih!

Two dogs have Mike pinned, one has a hold of his leg. The Lar'gih grabs the first one and drags it aside.

Leo kicks the other dog and grabs Mike.

I scramble forward and help Mike over the fence.

"Come on," I beg.

I grab Mike and drag him over my shoulders. He whimpers and clings to me.

Leo and Don start to wait, but I motion for them to run. The Lar'gih is occupied with the dogs.

But not for long.

"Run," I shout, "JUST RUN!"

We take off, I lag behind with Mike's weight. Thankfully years of hauling work allow me to run with weight on my shoulders, even so Mike is heavy and awkward to carry.

I grunt as I trip and scramble to get to my feet.

I hear the shriek and cringe.

"GET. AWAY. FROM. MY. BROTHERS!" I hear Leo scream.

I swear I just about faint from shock. He leaps over me and drags a blade out of the sheath. I hear a shriek of pain and then snarls.

Someone helps me to my feet, Don. Don pulls me and Mike forward.

"LEO!" I gasp.

"Come on Raph he's got it under control!" Don shouts.

I stagger after him, and turn and relieved I just start laughing. The Lar'gih is dead, and Leo is standing next to it, then to my horror he collapses.

"NO!" I manage.

Don leaps forward and scrambles to Leo's side. I watch horrified as don helps Leo stagger to his feet and then relax as Leo slings an arm around Don's shoulders and leans in to him. He's limping…but he's ok, just tired.

It's late morning when we manage to get back. Leo and Don are leaning against each other, Leo is still limping pretty bad .

Me?

I'm barely standing.

I hear shouting and find someone pulling Mike's unconscious frame from my shoulders. I feel my knees hit the ground and just manage to put my arms out to stop me from crashing onto my face.

"Daddy!" I hear.

I struggle to look but, find sleep dragging me under.

My brothers…

I groan, every muscle is stiff, sore, and feels like its been ripped to shreds. I start to sit up and find my body refusing to cooperate. Something moves beside me. Aria? It's my little girl.

"Shhh," I hear, "go back to sleep."

I realize as I drift off again that its Fuira, she's on my other side.

It's been four days since we broke Leo out, we've been hidden away. Carefully concealed inside Joban's own home. Joban freed me, Leo, Nel, Fuira, and Yelgeh yesterday. We got the tattoo over the slave brand. We can never, _never_ be slaves again with that there. Don and Mike got a special mark that shows that they are free men, no slaver will dare touch them now.

I lift Aria up as she demands my attention, smiling as she hugs me. Fuira and I were officially married yesterday. Leo, Don, Mike…my brothers all stood by my side.

Joban is going to call us in in a few hours, until then we have a decision to make.

Do we go back to New York and bring the family along?

Do we go to Yelgeh's home so she can see it one last time?

Do we start our own farmstead here?

Do we find a place in the city and wait until Nel and Leo's baby is born? Or do we leave right away?

There are other options too, but we can't stay here. Joban can't hide us from Svgar forever.

I roll over and find Aria grinning at me.

"What are you up to?" I tease, patting the bed beside me.

She scrambles up and snuggles close.

"Gaeh says we might go to your old home," she tells me.

I think of the crowded city, dark streets, and then, the life underground and flinch. Suddenly realizing what going home would mean.

"We…might…for a while," I murmur.

"Oh Uncle Donnie wanted me to give this to you," she says softly.

It's a letter, with my name written in penmanship that can only belong to my father.

"He said I couldn't open it," she mutters darkly.

"No, its…grown up stuff," I whisper, struggling to maintain calm as I hold the crumpled letter.

"Daddy?" she asks me.

"Yeah baby?" I reply.

"I…we…are we still slaves?" she asks.

I look at her and see the fear there.

"Baby you've been free," I tell her.

"I mean all of us," she whispers.

"No baby, we're free," I tell her.

She smiles.

* * *

Reviews Please???


	31. Chapter 31: The Letter

**Disclaimer:**** Uh unfortunately no. Just the OCs and Plot**

**Chapter 31: The Letter**

Aria fell asleep about an hour ago and Fuira is curled up next to her. I've crept off to read the letter from my father. I find a spot and sit down, my carapace leaned against the wall and brace myself for the words to come. Slowly I open the letter and begin reading.

_Raphael,_

_My son, you are the passion our family needed, the fuel that drove the courage of your brothers on, and the power behind each battle. My son without you this family is not whole, it lacks the passion that only you were able to provide. _

_Michaelangelo has lost the joy that was found in him every waking moment. He lost his joy when you failed to come home. There are many nights that I have found him asleep in your room, heard his tears when he thought no one was around. The television and video games are no longer touched, he has no one to play with. Donatello has become lost in his lab, barely leaving it and barely speaking to anyone. Without the interruptions that you and Michaelangelo provided he has forgotten how to stay united with each of us. He has become lost to me, bitter and cold. _

_They never stopped looking for you, searching and clinging to the frail hope that you would come home. Last year I announced both your and Leonardo's death. Neither took it well. I hated to give up on any chance for you to return, but daren't allow your brothers to place themselves in danger in any longer. _

_I have ached for the chance to tell you, you are my son. That despite Leonardo's leadership it changes nothing about how I feel about you. I ache to hear your voice and even miss the sound of you in the dojo with the punching bag._

_My son we need you to come home. We need a united family. I want my sons back, I want to have a whole family before I am gone._

_Your father,_

_Master Splinter_

I sit there for a while and think. Don and Mike never gave up hope on us. Master Splinter desperately wants me home. His hand writing is messy and it seems that it was a struggle for him to write.

Sensei, I'm coming home, but not until the whole family is ready.

* * *

Reviews Please?

Sorry for the short chapter but the rest will be longer 2 CHAPTERS LEFT!!


	32. Chapter 32: Journey and Reflection

**Disclaimer:**** only the OCs and Plot the cannon characters are not mine.**

*****Everyone here is a notice. I will be on Hiatus until February, other than the four one shots mentioned I will not be posting. When I return, **_**Chained Soul**_** and **_**Not the Same III: Final Years**_** will be posted. ****

***Also there will be a epilogue for this.****

**One Chapter left and then the Epilogue.**

**I might get the next chapter up tomorrow morning if not it will be up in the afternoon hopefully. I'm on the road all day so, who knows when I'll have time. If not you'll get it and the epilogue on Sunday.**

**Chapter 32: Journey and Reflection**

We decided that we would take Yelgeh to her home one last time before heading to Earth. The rest will be decided there.

If Nel is ready to give birth then, then we will wait long enough to have the child be born and then we will go to Earth. Don asked about Joban's story the other day and he told us before we left. Amazing story all in all. As I sit back I remember the story he told us, scant on the details but, still an amazing story.

_I was a slave once, Svgar's father owned me, after he died I broke out of the compound and sought work in the city. When I had enough I paid for my freedom and had the brand covered. I was a free man. _

_After I gained my freedom I worked as hard as I could saving all of my money except for the bare necessities in order to buy the land I now own. It didn't take long after I bought the land that slaves began to flee to my property. That is when the fence went up. It took me four years to build up this place, four more to start being able to free the slaves I bought after a year. I had to make money somehow so I started my horseracing business. That is how I can pay for all of this Donatello._

I still shake my head at the thought. I feel someone touch my shoulder and look up. It's Leo.

He shifts nervously and then signs. _can I sit?_

I nod, my sign/body language from when I was mute comes in handy.

He sits next to me and fumbles with his shirt sleeve.

"I…I can't go back to New York," he whispers. I give him a nervous look and touch his arm.

"Leo-" I start.

"I can't live underground again. I can't hide in the dark like I used to Raph…I just can't. I can't make my kids grow up in the sewers of-," he gags at the end and I squeeze his arm in comfort.

Tasting bile myself at the thought.

After he gathers himself again I wait.

"I can't," he whispers.

"I don't want to go back permanently either. But…I like to see April and Casey again," I whisper, "maybe dad…Don says he's been sick…"

"I know," I hear Leo mumble, he shudders, "but…after being underground for so long…and then seeing the sky…I can't give that up."

"I know…I can't give that up either bro. We arrive at Yelgeh's home tomorrow. We'll talk to Don and Mike about it then ok?" I whisper, glancing at the sleeping figures in the other seats.

"Ok," he mumbles, he sounds so submissive sometimes, mostly when he's truly upset.

He gets up and goes back to his seat. I try to go after him up remember Fuira and Aria in time. I glance down at them and smile. Fuira's scarlet tresses are in her face. I brush them away gently and then smile when I see how Aria is cuddled up to her. They bonded better than I could have ever dreamed. Aria adores her, Fuira feels the same way. Fuira is wearing a bracelet that matches my own and Arai is making herself one. Fuira is no weaver, she's a dancer, or was back home, now she says she'll learn to cook and sew from Yelgeh. She's been sitting in with Aria when Yelgeh's been teaching her.

I sigh and lean back, smiling as I feel Aria's hand tighten around one of my fingers.

….

I glance up at the sign on the farmstead Yelgeh had the hover-car bring us to. I've got Aria up on my hip and Fuira is standing beside me with her bag over her shoulder. I have my own and Aria's. Leo is carrying Gaeh and all of their bags. Nel is smiling, I can't believe how close she looks to having the baby already. Hard to believe the trip took us four months.

Yelgeh gets out and I swear I've never seen her move so fast. Don is carrying her things and Mike is following.

"OH!" I hear Yelgeh gasp. I follow her gaze and gasp myself.

The ocean.

I hear Nel give a little cry and move forward.

"Oh I forgot how beautiful it was," I hear Nel murmur.

"As did I my dear," Yelgeh whispers.

I turn my attention on Aria as she tugs on my bandanna.

"What is it sweat heart?" I ask.

"That's a big river!" she gasps.

I smile.

"It's called and Ocean," I tell her, "It goes all the way out there and all around the land."

I point and nothing stops me from smiling at the awe struck look on my daughter's face.

"Wow," she whispers.

Fuira giggles and reaches for my, _our_ daughter. Aria leans over and lets Furia hold her, she's getting too big for that but neither of us care.

Furia asked me if we'd have kids together. I told her it was her choice, I wouldn't pressure her on the subject.

"Come," Yelgeh orders, waving us after her.

…

"I'm busy, come back tomorrow," a man grumps as we walk in.

"Is that any way to speak to you sister Trogeh?" I hear Yelgeh chide.

The man whips around and stares at us in shock.

"Yelgeh?" I hear him gasp.

He's as old as she is and shares similar features.

"Hello little brother," she murmurs.

He stares at her a moment and then leaps forward and they embrace, tears start flowing after a few seconds and I hear the two crying.

"Daddy? Why is Grandma crying?" Arai asks in a too loud whisper.

"Because little one, I am home and I get to see my family," Yelgeh replies before I can.

Trogeh looks us over.

"My boys," I hear Yelgeh murmur, "Leh'yadar, Rah'yar, Don'elo, and Mik'lo."

"They are all your children?" Trogeh gasps.

"Yes," Yelgeh tells him, "they are my sons."

I'm stunned, she claimed us as her own. We've considered her a mother all this time, but to truly be claimed as her's is…amazing. That night there is a huge celebration and we find out that Yelgeh inherited this whole acreage. The beach, the woods to the north, and the rice fields are all her's, left by her father. Yelgeh is the eldest in her family and thus inherited the property, and in turn so did Leo as he is the eldest. But Yelgeh said that we were to _share_ it, all of us, the whole Doiklo family. Yelgeh Doiklo, and us…I am now both a Doiklo and a Hamato. At one time in my life I would've hated the idea of sharing such a prize with Leo, now he has much a right to it as I do. I'm willing to share.

…

It's two nights later as Fuira and I are spending time alone for the first time since our wedding night that I hear the news.

Yelgeh died last night, slipped away in her sleep, in her own bed. She left instructions for us. Her dying request was that we make things right with our father, and if we chose to, we could come back here. Back to a family that would welcome us.

Leo is nervous about going home, but he is trusting me on this and he told me that Yelgeh was right.

It was time to face our father, time to talk things through.

No blade will touch you Leo…no hand will.

In two months after the baby is born, we will take a transportal to Earth, time it for night time. We argued over whether or not to bring the children along and chose to. Even if Master Splinter chooses to disown Leo. April and Casey at least deserve to meet the kids.

I stand up and touch Yelgeh's grave marker.

"Pu'den Amu, pu'den eu sua'a," I whisper, wiping my tears away and heading back toward the main house. _(Rest mother, rest in peace)._

The others have long since left and only I've remained to watch the stars come out.

As I enter my quarters of the building I spot Aria curled in my bed, Fuira humming to her.

I start to ask and then stop as Fuira raises a finger to her lips.

"She misses Yelgeh," Fuira tells me.

I sigh and sit down rubbing Aria's carapace gently.

"When is Yelgeh coming back?" Aria sobs.

"Baby, she's not coming back…" I tell her, "she's….she's gone on a journey ahead of us. We'll meet her there some day."

"Can we start now?" she asks.

"Every day brings us closer," I reply, pulling my daughter into a hug, "you see…it's a journey only those that their time is up take."

"She won't hurt anymore?" Aria asks.

"No baby, she won't hurt anymore," I murmur.

"She can sew all she wants now," Aria whispers, smiling a little through her tears.

"Yeah, all she wants. I bet she'll have a thousand dresses and blankets for you when its time to go see her," I whisper back, giving her a kiss on the forehead.

"I can't wait," Aria whispers.

I can, I don't want you to go yet my little angel. Not yet.

* * *

Starfire207- loved your review. Sorry I never replied before I was ahead on typing and didn't have time to add something in. Very nice and I'm glad you feel as I do on the concept. Things never will be the same and the brothers are different people. Don and Mike are beginning to realize that. Everything will work out in the end. Thanks for the review!!!

Modhex-Sorry I never replied before I was ahead on typing and didn't have time to add something in. Leo's letter will be revealed in _Chained Soul_ since I have decided to write it. I know, I know I'm torturing all of you by going through a whole other story but I feel as the author that having Leo's reaction will mean more in the instance than Raph's . You will get an idea of what was in Leo's letter in this story but won't get to read it until the parallel story. Thanks for the review!!!

**A parallel is a story that is retold through another character's point of view, it often has revelations as to the areas of time that were lost in the original.**

PLEASE REVIEW GUYS!!!!


	33. Chapter 33: New York

**Disclaimer:**** Only the OCs and the Plot, the cannon characters are property of Nickelodeon, Peter Laird, and Kevin Eastman. **

**Chapter 33: New York**

New York, a place that I used to call home. It's raining right now, pouring. The city stinks, I forgot what is was like to breathe in smog constantly. Aria started coughing when we got here, so did Gaeh, and the rest of us for that matter. Leo, myself, Don, and Mike all stopped yesterday but the kids are still coughing pretty good. Thankfully the baby is fine.

The baby, Leo has another son. Named him Kiyoshi after our grandfather Master Yoshi. He's adorable, I have to admit. He's much lighter in color, more like his mom but he has Leo's eyes. Gaeh and Kiyoshi if they are anything like me and Leo those two will fight like crazy.

I glance up as Fuira she's curled up in the apartment we took shelter in two days ago when we got here. Don and Mike went home to tell Master Splinter that we are here, but we refuse to go underground.

I tense as there is a knock. Leo gets up from where he is, Kiyoshi is cradled in his arm, but I know if the person on the other side is hostile, Leo won't let the boy in his arms be harmed.

Leo pauses and waits.

Another knock, two fast and one hard.

It's Don. We relax and Leo pulls the door open.

"Leo?" I hear a woman gasp.

April. Even after all this time I can recognize her. I step forward a little as Leo steps back.

"Oh," I hear her gasp.

She's looking at Kiyoshi, Leo tenses up, but lets her get a better look.

"His…his name is Kiyoshi," Leo mumbles.

"Can I-" she starts, reaching as if to hold him.

Leo flinches and pulls back. I see the shocked look on her face. He's real protective of the infant, especially since he was never there for Gaeh's birth.

"Hey April," I greet, taking her attention of Leo and the baby.

She turns to me and freezes.

"Raph?" she breathes.

I nod.

Her eyes travel across the room and she pauses as she see Aria and Gaeh watching her. She walks over to them and crouches down. Aria tenses and Gaeh moves a little closer to her.

"Well hello," She greets, "what are your names?"

I realize I'm tense as a spring and so is Leo. Fuira gets up and I glance at her to tell her its ok. Even so I'm nervous.

Aria looks at me and then back at April.

"My daddy doesn't like you," she whispers.

April glances over her shoulder at me and then Leo and moves away from the kids. I feel myself relax. Leo and I both jump the kids take off as the door bangs open. Fuira and Nel vanish, taking Kiyoshi with them.

Leo is dropped into a defensive crouch and I leap forward to grab the figure that is coming in.

"RAPH NO!" I hear April scream.

I manage to avoid the figure just in time, twisting so I run up the wall and flip back onto my feet.

I growl at the man and then freeze when I see his hands up in a "no-threat" position. Then I recognize him, its Casey.

Leo relaxes and heads after the rest of the family.

I stare at Casey and take in how much he's changed in ten years. His black hair has some grey streaks now.

"Man Raph…you look…-" Casey starts.

"Alive," I cut off and turn to follow Leo toward the back.

I hear April and Casey talking as I leave.

_Don warned us that they get nervous._

_But it's Raph…you saw him he stopped when he saw it was me._

_He stopped because I screamed Casey, he didn't recognize you._

_Ape…he knew, no way he forgot me I'm his best bud._

_Don said he had a lot of memory problems Casey, they went through a lot. Casey he nearly attacked me when I got to close to his daughter. They're really protective. Casey Leo, __**Leo **__wouldn't let me hold his son. He flinched when I tried to take the boy._

_I…-_

I'm out of range then and I really start looking for Aria and Fuira. A hear a soft cough and drop down to find Aria staring back at me out of a hole in the wall.

"Hey baby," I tell her.

"Is it ok to come out now Daddy?" she asks.

"Yeah it's ok," I tell her, pulling her out and lifting her into my arms. Fuira steps out of the broken wall and asks with her eyes.

"It's ok," I tell her, she relaxes instantly and straightens her hair out.

Women.

I chuckle and stop her.

"You look fine," I tell her.

"Fine?" she hisses, "I look _horrible_."

I kiss her and smile.

"You're always beautiful to me," I tease.

She blushes a little a smiles.

"You're my husband you are supposed to say that," she mutters.

I pull her close and kiss her forehead before directing her toward the main room.

I spot Leo cradling a nervous Gaeh and an anxious Nel, Kiyoshi clutched close.

As we enter the main room I see April arguing with Casey.

I clear my throat and wait. They turn to us and give us embarrassed looks.

"Daddy?" I hear Gaeh ask, "Why does they look funny?"

Leo and I crack a grin and start laughing. Humans weren't common where we were, Joban was only half so they really haven't see many humans, if at all.

"What's funny?" I hear Gaeh beg softly.

I see Leo cuddle him and smile.

….

I sit back into the couch with a groan, my whole body relaxing. It's _soft_.

We left with April and Casey about an hour ago and came to their place. Kiyoshi is asleep in the other room, Gaeh, Aria, and April and Casey's son Kale are playing in the other room.

Leo is cuddled up on t he couch with Nel in his lap, tense as a spring but making an effort to stay calm. Nel keeps rubbing her thumb across his hand, comforting him best she can right now. Her blonde hair is pulled back now, its in a braid.

Fuira sits down next to me, snuggling up. I wrap an arm around her and sigh as her head rests on my shoulder. The scarlet curls falling in waves around her.

Master Splinter is on his way with Don and Mike. I'm honestly as nervous as Leo is. Anxious to know how our father will handle our stories. There is a tapping at the window and April walks over to open it. I watch, stunned, as a much older Master Splinter comes through the window leaning heavily on April's arm. I hear him breathe in sort of raspy like, and flinch.

Don and Mike are in soon after and they help him over to the large chair April had gotten ready for him. I spy Leo's tension out of the corner of my eye and fight my own rising fear.

Before I realize it the words are out of my mouth.

"He won't touch you Leo," I hear myself growl.

Our father visibly flinches.

"My sons," he rasps, "please…come forward."

I grit my teeth and get up, gently pushing Fuira aside and walking over to our father. I don't kneel. I will never bow or kneel to anyone again.

Leo joins me and stands nervously beside me.

"Kneel my sons," Master Splinter orders.

Leo starts to drop and I see the submissive fear in his actions. I stop him by grabbing his arm and feel how bad he's trembling.

"No," I growl.

"Enough," I hear Master Splinter rasp, "Leonardo what is the meaning of this?"

He shakes against me.

"We were slaves Sensei…we…I won't bow and…neither will Raph," Leo mumbles.

Master Splinter's ears tip back in annoyance and I see his onyx eyes flash at us. He gets to his feet and glares at both of us.

"Donatello and Michaelangelo told me that you were different. I see only the same rebel and the same weak son that left before," he rasps.

I feel Leo flinch, quivering as I seek to comfort him. He pulls from my grip and drops to his knees. Desperate for our father's love. Wanting only to please him.

Master Splinter…how dare he? After all we've been through. We hoped to come home and at least be welcomed not ordered around.

I grab Leo's arm and haul him to his feet. He comes after me as I grab the kids and we all leave.

"RAPHAEL! LEONARDO!" I hear Master Splinter shout.

"GO TO HELL!" I shout back.

….

Four days later Don comes to find us.

I growl and try to attack him. He holds his hands up and back away.

"He's dying Raph…please just come say good-bye. He's our father!" Don begs.

I growl.

"He treated us like nothing," I spit.

"You hurt him the other night…he…he-" Don stammers

"He wanted us to bow and kiss his feet, he insulted Leo, insulted _me_," I snap back.

Don closes his eyes and leans against the door frame.

"You aren't coming are you?" he whispers.

"No," I growl.

"He loves both of you, you know that right? He doesn't judge you for what happened," Don whispers as I stalk off.

"Oh yeah?" I spit, "so why did he want us to bow?"

"Respect," Don mumbles, "as the father and master ninja he is Raph. He just…he hoped you two would still bow to him. He…cried when you all left. He realized his mistake too late."

"Yeah, definitely too late," I grumble.

"Please?" I hear him beg before I vanish into the dark.

No, underground is all I knew for eight and a half years. Going back to that even for a moment would drive me mad.

I walk into the area where the others are sleeping and find Leo sitting with a letter in his hands.

It's the one that Master Splinter wrote him.

He looks up and I see tears rolling down his cheeks.

"He was really sorry Raph…he just…he still wanted my respect despite his faults," Leo mumbles.

I brace myself and sigh.

"Don says he's…he's going," I mumble.

Leo looks at me and stands up.

"We…we should go…one last time and…-" his voice trails off.

I walk over and grip his shoulder.

"Are you sure?" I ask him.

He nods.

We wake the women and tell them we won't be gone long. Then, together, we head down to the street and then pause before nervously lift the manhole cover and drop down. The stench is horrible and we barely remember the way home but we find it and walk inside.

Mike is heading toward a back room and stops when he sees us.

"You came!" he gasps.

I nod and look at Leo.

Mike tackles us moments later and it takes all Leo has not to panic. After I receive the same greeting he drags us to Master Splinter.

…

We're kneeling at his bedside, each of us holding a hand.

"My sons…please…forgive…me," he rasps, he pulls a hand out of Leo's grip.

I see Leo's lower lip tremble and the agony in his gaze. He thinks…oh please Sensei don't do this to him.

Then to my surprise and Leo's shock, Master Splinter cups Leo's cheek and smiles.

"You…always…made me proud…you were never weak…never my son," he tells him.

I see the tears roll down Leo's cheek as he clutches our father's hand.

My own tears fall as he turns to me.

"My strong son, you always knew how to there for your brothers….you did good…keep protecting them for me?" it's a request not an order.

I gently squeeze his hand and nod, choking back tears.

"Of course Sensei," I mumble.

…

Casey just placed the tombstone. We…we're all heading inside now. I see Leo holding Gaeh and smiling at Kiyoshi as Nel coos to the boy and glance at Fuira.

She smiles and takes my hand. I stop when I feel where she put it and stare at her.

"I didn't want to say when your fath-" she starts. I stop and drop in front of her, figners touching her stomach and smiling back up at her.

"Daddy?" Aria asks.

I smile and pull her close, placing her hand on Fuira's belly.

"You're going to have a new sister or brother," I tell her.

Her eyes get big and she touches Fuira's belly.

"I'm your sister, we'll play all the time," she whispers.

Yes…you will.

In life we have our chains, but with our hearts we learn to over come them and find ourselves. We find who we are and remember those that stood around us in the worst times.

I glance at Don and Mike before walking over and hugging both of them.

"We are always brothers," I tell them, "no matter where we are."

"But you're going back to-" Mikey starts.

"We'll visit often," I cut off, "we just aren't part of New York anymore. Our hearts found the way to break our chains only when the sky and the dirt were ours to see. We're free, and going back into hiding would be nothing more than another kind of slavery. We broke our chains, let us keep them that way."

"I understand," Don whispers, "can…can we visit?"

"Anytime…within reason," I chuckle before going back to Fuira and Aria.

Leo pauses and reaches for our brothers before encasing them in a hug.

* * *

Review Please!!!!!


	34. Epilogue

**Disclaimer:**** "sighs" oh my…well last part of this fic and I still have yet to own the cannon characters. "shrugs"**

**Epilogue **

Fuira gave birth to our son last night. My little boy. Named him Kol after Fuira's younger brother that was lost in the slave camps.

Kol has darker skin like mine and has his mother's more golden eyes rather than my Amber.

We've come back to New York for a few days.

Leo is ready to tell his whole story to us and I'm going to be showing off Kol. We're at the farmhouse where we won't have to worry about anyone seeing us and the kids can play easily.

Kol is currently being cuddled by April. Fuira is curled up beside me, she insisted on being here as Leo tells his story.

The other kids are in bed and Leo settles himself into his chair and with Nel's hand in his, he starts to tell us.

"Well…it started with a fight…three nights after Master Splinter announced that I was head of the clan…" I settle back and listen.

Time for his story to be told.

The. End.

* * *

**Well look for _Chained Soul _in February.**

**Please Review!!!**

**Thanks to all of my reviewers! It meant a lot hearing back from you!!!!!!**

**Thanks to my beta Raphfreak who threatened my life for leaving her at cliffhangers as much as i left you guys. LOL **

**Thanks every one!!!**


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